


i can't get over the way (you love me like you do)

by callumsmitchells



Category: EastEnders (TV)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, M/M, Smut, fake dating au, fake dating to real dating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-23
Updated: 2020-09-28
Packaged: 2021-03-05 08:47:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 23,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25468006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/callumsmitchells/pseuds/callumsmitchells
Summary: Ben and Callum are close friends, and that's all they are...except their friends start to believe that something more is going on. They decide to play a prank, and pretend that they are dating, but what happens when feelings start to get blurred and both Ben and Callum realise they no longer want it to be a prank?
Relationships: Callum "Halfway" Highway/Ben Mitchell
Comments: 42
Kudos: 243





	1. chapter one

**Author's Note:**

> it's here!!! this fic is months in the making - i had the idea initially in december, but i've had so many other things to do before this fic, but i decided to bite the bullet, and finally write it! it will be multichaptered, but hopefully it won't be long between each chapter, so you don't have to wait long (if everything goes to plan)
> 
> i hope you enjoy, and feel free to like kudos/comments x
> 
> tumblr: @callumsmitchells

Music crackles out from the radio as raindrops race one another down the kitchen windows, creating patterns of connected lines against the glass. There's a faint aroma of spice lingering in the air, and Callum's stomach rumbles as he leans against the kitchen counter top. He's been living in Walford for just shy of six months, and this is the first time his newfound friendship group will see the inside of his house for more than just a few moments. It's a stressful thought, though he's somehow relaxed, thankfully completely in his element cooking food. He's been somewhat excited for this night since it was first brought up in conversation, what seems like months ago now. 

_ Callum's stood behind the bar, confined to one area, in the corner of the Queen Victoria. He's been working there for months now, ever since he moved to Walford to be closer to his childhood family friends. He found a house, going for cheap for the area, a complete bargain, and without really even thinking, he was soon moving in, despite only knowing a few people in the area. Of course, it was a terrifying prospect initially, but he's been in worse situations throughout his life, so he was quite okay with that. The fear of the initial decision was nothing, in the grand scheme of things.  _

_ Jay slams his pint glass down onto the pint mat he's placed on the bar, the corners of it fraying and bent, curling upwards. "Anyway when are we getting to taste your food then mate?" He asks, and there’s a slight slur to his words. It's been a long day, a long week really, and all three of them are letting their hair down in their local pub - Jay, Lola and Ben.  _

_ The latter winces, the noise of the pint glass brash, close to his ear.  _

_ Callum laughs awkwardly, his hands gripping on tightly to the edge of the bar, his body pulling away from them. His knuckles are white. "I'm barely moved in yet!" He explains. "I spend most of my time working here, so my house is still a mess. When I've got everything in place, you can all come around. We can make a dinner party of it."  _

_ Lola quickly agrees to it, and starts to talk about what she could wear for such an occasion, even though it's only a meal around at a friend's house.  _

_ Ben smirks over his lager, eyes wide and light, but stays silent, watching Callum as he walks off to do his job, taking drinks orders off of people none of them have ever seen before. _

There's a tapping knock at the front door, and Callum's heart sinks below his stomach. It's too early for them to come. He looks at the clock, bolted onto the wall in the centre of the kitchen, and notices that it's only seven in the early evening, when he knows he previously arranged for them to arrive around eight. The table isn't even set yet, and that's suddenly a huge cause of anxiety for Callum. He pads over to the door, hoping that when he opens it he isn't bombarded with his friends because as much as he does love spending time with them, he really can't deal with them showing up before he's even remotely prepared. He exhales a shaky breath with closed eyes, before he pushes the handle down, pulling the door open. When he opens his eyes, Ben is smiling back at him, holding up a bottle of red wine in anticipation. 

"I knew you'd be stressing, so I thought I'd come over to help you." He announces, walking through the door and past Callum. "Now, I can't cook - but I can lay a table, and calm you down." 

Callum smiles, breathing a sigh of relief as he closes the door behind Ben. He's grateful for him, the closest of his new friendship group, and the only one who knows about the anxiety that plagues him. "Thank you." Callum says, sincerely. "Everything for the table is in that cupboard over there, I just need to sort the sauce out."

"Smells good, whatever it is." Ben grins, placing the wine bottle down on the table with a dull thud, before walking over to the cupboard. 

Still stirring the sauce, Callum looks back at Ben, watching him carrying four plates in one hand, glass bottles in the other. "It's Mexican barbeque sauce. Thought we could just have something basic."

Ben raises his eyebrows. "Basic for us is smiley faces and chicken dippers." He laughs. "This is proper restaurant material."

Anxiety courses through Callum. "Is it too much?" He asks, desperation in his voice.

"Absolutely not!" Ben shakes his head. "We will eat anything. Plus, Lola's still getting ready, so she's treating this as a big thing. Trust me. It will be perfect."

Callum smiles, a feeling floating around his chest that he just can’t explain. It’s like a mix of anxiousness, happiness and gratefulness all at once, an overwhelming swirl of emotions spreading through him. “You look good, by the way.” Callum points out, looking at Ben as he sets the table, placing knives and forks against the woodwork with a metallic clanging. He’s wearing a pair of jeans and a white button up shirt. Callum’s definitely seen it before, it’s a common outfit for Ben to wear if he’s going out, but it’s somewhat calming to see that he dresses up for a meal at a friends house - though knowing Lola, she more than likely didn't let him leave the house until he was dressed nicely.

“Thanks.” Ben grins, and Callum’s almost certain he can see a blush creeping its way onto, and across, Ben’s cheeks. “You too.” He says, looking up at Callum through hooded eyes and fluttering lashes. 

Callum flushes, and looks back at the food, quickly attempting to hide any visible blushing from Ben. Time ticks by, music still remaining on the radio crackling through old, slow songs which add to the relaxation of the evening. Ben opens a bottle of wine, and pours himself and Callum a glass each, both of them waiting in anticipation of Jay and Lola arriving. 

It's not long waiting, wine glasses only a quarter of the way empty, when there's a tap at the door and Callum puts his glass down on the kitchen counter, inwardly cringing at himself for not using a coaster. He stretches out his fingers and he can hear them crack, right before he opens the door and his friends come bounding their way in, Lola pressing a kiss to Callum's cheek, chatting away. "We've got no idea where Ben's got to, he said he would come over to ours but didn't show up." 

And then she sees him, sitting at the table, red wine in hand, left leg crossing over his right loosely. "Oh, you're here already!" She grins. "Glad to see you can get yourself dressed."

"Yes, thank you  _ mother _ ." Ben teases. "I don't need any help to choose what I look good in - I look good in anything." 

Jay rolls his eyes, sitting down at the table. "As modest as ever, I see." 

"You know me Jay, ever the modest one." Ben grins, taking a sip of his wine, allowing himself to relax as they all sit at the dining table. Callum looks at ease too, thankfully. Ben knows that by being there prior to Jay and Lola announcing themselves, he allowed Callum to relax.

* * *

They're all sitting around the dining table; Callum with Ben to his right, Lola on the opposite side to him, Jay next to her. It's nice, relaxing. They're on their third bottle of wine, the empty two sitting on the side of the sink. The main course is long gone, plates having been scraped empty, compliments entirely to the chef, which caused Callum to shyly blush, and thank them all. They're all laughing and telling stories, tipsy and happy. Callum's hand is reaching across and resting against the top of Ben's chair, and if he stretches his fingers out just the tiniest amount, they would be threading through his hair. Ben knocks his head back, laughing at a story Jay has just been telling, and Callum chuckles along too, though he was barely following the story, more focusing on Ben's side profile. He quickly jerks his hand away, and if anyone was watching him, they didn't make it obvious. He stands up, towering over the three of them.

"I made some brownies." He explains. "Thought we could have some of those for dessert."

If there's one thing that makes everyone happy, it's chocolate. 

The rest of the evening runs smoothly, all of them finishing a fourth bottle of wine, words slurring and only crumbs of broken up brownies remaining in sight. Lola looks around the house, and admires how it's all open plan, something unique to a house in Walford. There's an exposed brick wall, with a television hooked onto it. The house itself is small, but for just Callum, it seems perfect, and he's really made it homely in the months he's been living there. 

"You've done a great job here though, to say you've been working a full time job since you moved here." She comments.

"I only really finished it all the other day." Callum explains. "But the house was in good condition when I bought it so it wasn't a big job or anything - I just had to get a few bits to turn it into a home."

They're about to leave, Jay helping Lola put her coat on but struggling, probably something to do with the amount of alcohol they've both consumed. "It looks better than our place anyway." Jay jokingly comments, and Ben's eyes nearly pop out of his head in shock, trying desperately not to laugh. 

Lola throws her hand out, slapping it against Jay's chest in horror, and looks over at Ben, who is still sitting at the dinner table. "Are you coming?" She asks.

"No." Ben shakes his head. "I'll help Callum tidy up, it'll be easier if we both do it." 

Lola nods. "I'll see you tomorrow then." She says, yawning, before she looks up at the clock that is hooked onto the wall, noticing that it's now past the midnight hour, somehow. "Or, later on today." 

Callum smiles, and presses a kiss to her cheek, and pulls Jay in for a hug, before he waves them away, watching as they leave his house. Ben's now standing at the sink, letting warm water run over plates, cleaning them. 

"You don't have to do that." Callum says, walking over to him. "You being here early was enough." 

"I want to." Ben smiles up to Callum, handing him a clean, wet plate. "I wash and you dry?" 

Callum huffs out a laugh, shaking his head in disbelief, but he takes the plate anyway, and holds up a clean tea towel as he dries it. Every so often, their fingertips touch as they pass cutlery between them, but it just feels normal to share something so domesticated between each other, even if the clock is ticking away into the early hours of the morning. 

"Do you fancy a cup of tea?" Callum asks softly when they reach their last object to wash and dry. His eyes feel heavy, but he's not willing to let sleep overtake him, not willing to let Ben walk away and have this moment lost in the abyss of foreverness. 

"Sounds perfect." Ben smiles softly, even though his whole body is screaming out for him to sleep.

Callum flicks the switch on the kettle, and a blue light appears. Ben sits on the sofa, sinking into the material, feeling his aching bones relax with the relief of sitting down somewhere comfortable. Callum follows him moments later, and sits down next to him, handing a mug to Ben. 

"I didn't realise how late it was, sorry." Callum winces, taking a sip of his tea. 

Ben shakes his head, a smile on his face. "It's fine. Neither of us have to be anywhere tomorrow." 

"It's still late." Callum said. "Early? I don't even know, I'm that tired."

Ben chuckles out a laugh, thoughts swirling around in his brain. "Do you want me to go?" He asks, lightness spreading through his voice. 

"No!" Callum grins, but makes an attempt at hiding his smile behind his mug, holding it up to his face. "You can stay here tonight if you want? Kip on the sofa - it'll save you walking home alone."

"Yeah?" Ben asks, suddenly shy, for some stupid reason. "Yeah, I will do." He finishes his tea, and places it down on the coffee table in front of him. 

Callum follows, though there's the tiniest bit of his drink still remaining in the bottom of the mug, swirling around as he puts it down. "I'll get you a blanket." He says, standing up. "Don't want you freezing to death in the middle of the night." His bones ache, and there's a knot that's suddenly appeared in his neck, but he fights through the tiredness and the aching, and grabs the fluffy blanket that usually perches at the edge of his own bed, and carries it back to Ben. 

"Here you go." He announces, expecting to see Ben sitting up on the sofa, anticipating Calllum coming back into view - but he's laying down, his head pushing against a cushion, arm underneath it, sleeping. A faint whistle of a snore escapes Ben's mouth and Callum can't help but smile. He looks so at peace, even though it must be uncomfortable, sleeping in his clothes. Callum places in the blanket around Ben, and grabs the two mugs that they have previously been drinking from, and places them in the skin, ready to be cleaned tomorrow. He doesn't want to risk running the water through the taps and potentially waking Ben up. Callum turns, and attempts to walk back past Ben, straight into his bedroom, but something stops him, as though a magnetic force is pulling him to Ben, and before he can even help himself, he's crouching down over him, and pressing a gentle - but quick - kiss to his hairline, before he manages to drag himself away, finally retiring to his bedroom.


	2. chapter two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the morning after Callum's dinner party, and he and Ben spend the morning together. Later on, the fake dating idea begins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for all the love on the first chapter! i hope you enjoy this chapter too x
> 
> tumblr: @callumsmitchells

White lights beam into the building through the window, causing Ben to twitch his eyes open as he wakes. The curtains are wide open, and it's so bright, it makes his eyes sting as the glare overtakes him and he has no idea where he is for a moment, before he remembers.  _ Callum _ . There's an ache in his shoulders, and he knows it's because he's not been able to sleep in any position other than directly onto his shoulder all night. He pushes up, and spins his head in a circle, stretching it out. There’s a relaxing crack that sears through his nerves. He'll regret sleeping on the sofa at some point today, but right now he really can't bring himself to care all that much. Right now, he focuses on the fact he desperately needs the toilet, and to do that, he needs to pass Callum's bedroom. 

His door is open halfway, and there's a strobe of sunlight shining through onto the corridor, lighting up the floor, but Ben doesn't look in, he knows that Callum is already awake. The clock tells the time of just before nine in the morning, and there's a faint muffle of sound coming from his room, like some early morning cooking show. It makes Ben smile at the simplicity of it all. He barely makes any noise, not wanting to disturb the peace that surrounds them. The toilet flushes, and he winces at the harshness of it, but he tiptoes back into the open space, thankful that Callum hasn't left his bedroom yet. Ben flicks on the kettle, and the hiss of it breaks up the silence. He stretches out his arms, and he can feel the warmth of the sun against his skin. It's nice. There's no rush, no need to be anywhere. The kettle clicks to a halt, and steam rises from the spout before Ben pours hot water into two mugs, and puts only a little bit of milk into each. The spoon rattles against the metal of the sink and there's a sound of a child screaming from outside. He winces, but picks the mugs up regardless, and slowly walks back the way he came, this time stopping in front of Callum's bedroom. He knocks with his elbow, and peaks his head around the edge of the door, looking at Callum in bed. The quilt is bundled up around him and his hair is flat against his head. The television is showing someone baking, but Ben can't look away from Callum. He isn't wearing a shirt, and a million things are swirling around Ben's head, but he's also more than aware that he's currently standing like a spare part with Callum looking up at him, expectantly. 

"Made us some tea." Ben says, extending a hand to that Callum can grab his mug. Their fingers brush against one another and there's a fumble which results in a drop of tea falling onto Callum's hand. "Hope you don't mind."

"Course not." Callum smiles, taking a sip of his tea. "Could get used to this." He teases. 

Ben stands there, not knowing whether to leave Callum alone, or to sit down somewhere. There's a blush spread over his cheeks, and Callum huffs out a laugh, taking one hand off of his mug, grabbing hold of his quilt before pushing it halfway down the bed. "Get in then." Callum announces, looking down at the empty space in bed beside him. 

Ben complies. How could he not? He stands on one leg as he hooks the other under the quilt, and instantly he can feel the heat from Callum beating against him. It's unusually comfortable, being this close to Callum, their elbows bashing against one another as they watch the television in each others company. There's a silence between them, bar a few chuckles of laughter when something goes wrong and it's nice. Natural. Ben looks at Callum mid laugh, and his eyes have wrinkles next to them and there's a cherry blossom blush that spreads from his cheeks down to his exposed chest. Ben realises there and then, he could be right here for the rest of his life and have no complaints about how he ends up there. 

There's a buzz and it breaks up the silence. "Is that mine?" Callum asks, searching for his phone in his bed. 

"No it's mine." Ben announces, pulling his phone out of his jean pocket, noticing that it's close to dying. He'll need to charge it when he gets back home. "It's Lola." 

Callum nods and drains the last of his tea, before leaning over Ben's body to put his mug down on the bedside table. "Is it important?" He asks.

"Probably not, but I can't be bothered with her having a fit at me not answering." Ben grins and presses the answer button, and Lola's face appears on the screen, blonde hair falling all over the place. "Mornin'." 

Lola smiles, though it doesn't reach her eyes and Ben just knows that her hangover is horrific. "Morning." She responds and she opens her mouth to speak again, before she realises someone's next to Ben, a bare shoulder appearing on the screen. "Ben Mitchell did you go out on the pull after you left Callum's last night?"

Ben furrows his brow and there's a burst of a laugh exploding from Callum as he tilts his head against Ben's shoulder and announces himself on the screen to Lola. There's a wide grin on both Ben and Callum's faces and Lola has no idea what to say about it, so she just stays silent. Callum keeps his head against Ben's shoulder, as Ben and Lola talk, and Callum can't even focus on what's being said because Ben twists his arm out from under the weight of Callum to wrap his arm around him and for some reason, he can't help but suddenly thread his fingers through Callum's hair as he's listening to Lola complaining about how she's got two customers at once in the salon later today and her hangover just won't shift. It's so domestic he can't believe it's actually happening, but it just feels so natural and he loves the weight of Callum leaning against him like it's all his body was made for. There's not a single part of him that cares that Lola can see it all from over the phone, and clearly Callum doesn't care about it either, or else he would pull away from the embrace, but instead he falls into it, and just off screen he's wrapping a hand around Ben's stomach, their bodies morphing together.

* * *

"We'll see you later, alright?" Lola asks, and there's a smile that's lighting up her face. 

There's a crackle over the phone, some movement and then Ben's speaking once more. "Yeah, see you later." The call disconnects and she drops her phone on the table with a rattle, and she doesn't even care about how the noise clangs around her hangover induced brain. 

Jay walks into the kitchen and instantly picks up the leftover toast of Lola's, overly buttered and now stone cold, but he's not at all fussy. "What's all that about?" He asks, pointing to her phone and then waves his hand in a circle over her face, pinpointing her grin.

"Ben stayed at Callum's last night." She explains. Jay looks lost, trying to work out why that would make his girlfriend so happy. "They're in bed together." 

"Oh."  _ That would explain it then.  _ "And you think they're together?"

Lola stands up, grabbing her now empty plate and shoves it in the sink. "It makes sense. Ben was there when we showed up yesterday, he stayed over last night. They've been flirting with each other for ages now Jay, we just didn't realise it."

"Have they?" Jay asks, and he looks half ready to leave the house now to go to work. 

Lola rolls her eyes.  _ Typical _ . "You just haven't realised it, but they have." She interjects. "Anyway, you'll see it tonight, because we're meeting them at the Vic."

"Is Callum not working?" Jay asks, fingers loosely holding onto the door handle, cautiously looking at his watch, not wanting to be late. 

"He's just said he's got today and most of tomorrow off as well, so he can properly join us tonight." She explains, and holds her hand out. 

Jay lets go of the handle, and walks over to Lola, bending down to press a kiss to her lips. "Talk about a busman's holiday." He laughs, pecking her lips again. "I'll see you later."

* * *

It's much later on in the day, the early signs of darkness clouding over them, the streetlights that are spread across the square start flickering into life. The Queen Vic is busy, as per usual on a night, everyone heading over there for drinks with friends and family after a long day of working. It's a place of respite for all the inhabitants of Walford, and Callum is grateful he isn't working because of how busy it is. 

"Is there a table free?" Ben asks, Jay following behind him. 

Lola walks in front of them, and directs them to a table in the corner, hiding away from everyone at the bar. It's probably one of the positives of being as small as she is, being able to make her way through a crowd of people without so much as a fuss. The tables got empty glasses and crisp packets on it, but it doesn't seem like anyone's still sitting there, so they sit down. Callum grabs the empty glasses, and packets and nods over to the bar. "I'll get them in." 

They all nod, and Callum walks over to the bar, emptying his hands onto it. Mick walks over to him, and Ben watches as they converse, laughing at something. He's completely out of it, fixated on Callum, that he doesn't notice that both Jay and Lola are trying to talk to him. Instead, he just stands up, and the sound of him dragging his chair across the floor breaks him out of his spell. "I'll help him." He says. "There's no way he can carry four drinks to us without spilling a drop."

Lola waits for a moment, just until she knows that Ben is out of the way of viewing her and then she raises an eyebrow. "They can't bear to be apart." 

"He's just helping him bring drinks over." Jay chuckles, still not fully believing that neither of them wouldn't tell him if they were seeing each other.

"Callum works here." Lola says, as if it's obvious. "Do you really think he can't carry a few pints at once?" 

Jay nods, accepting that Lola's right, Callum  _ is _ more than capable of carrying more than two drinks at once. He usually does it multiple times a day. "But that doesn't mean they're together." Because it doesn't. Ben just might want to be helpful. That doesn't mean anything. 

"Does it not?" Lola asks, raising an eyebrow. "Look at them, and then tell me you don't think that something's going on between the pair of them."

They both look over to the bar, and see Callum leaning against it as Mick is making up pints and putting the glasses down on the counter. Ben is copying Callum's stance, one leg pressing against his calf as he stands cross-legged, looking up at Callum, as though he's drinking in every word he's saying. There's a blush on both of their cheeks, and they look like innocent teenagers trying to have a conversation, entirely preparing for someone to make a wolf whistling noise towards them. Ben's got his hand resting on Callum's waist and there's smiles on both their faces and yeah, maybe Lola's right, maybe they are secretly together.

Jay and Lola face each other again, silently acknowledging each other and quickly having a conversation with their eyes and facial expressions before four pint glasses are placed down on the table in front of them - three held by Callum, one by Ben, and they all smile to each other, picking up a pint glass each and taking their first tiny sip of it, and then a longer sip following that first initial taster. There's a smirk on Ben's face, and he fires over a wink in Callum's direction and it doesn't go unnoticed by either Lola nor Jay.

There's music playing, though none of them can recognise the lyrics or even the tune, not over the chatter and the laughter of the people in the Vic. Everyone seems to be in tonight, more people than chairs and even though that means there's a longer wait than usual for their next round of drinks, it's nice. People are queuing for the dart board, holding three darts in one hand, pint in the other, and laughing when someone messes up on their go. There's stories on everyone's lips, and with more alcohol being consumed, the worse the recollection of fables get. Lola's talking about how she somehow managed to cut the wrong person's hair today, only a short snip but still embarrassing, apparently, but the alcohol has gone straight to all their heads and on top of their just about fading hangover, they all know they're in for a rough time of it tomorrow. Callum's got his hand around his pint glass, probably his fifth or sixth - nobody is really counting. It's almost empty, along with the rest of the glasses and that means it's Lola's round. Ben's fingers are pressing delicately against Callum's, just featherlight and barely there but it leaves a burning sensation on their skin. Lola notices it and stands up, stumbling over her feet though she barely moves. 

"Jay." She says, voice light. She nods over to the bar. "Help me get the next round in." 

He complies, and stands up too, blood rushing to his head. They both walk together, holding one another up and it's almost laughable. 

Ben chuckles softly, and Callum falls back into his chair. "Do you think they believe us?" He asks.

"Course they do." Ben grins. "Lola nearly exploded when she saw our hands touching."

Callum laughs, bright and beautiful and it nearly takes Ben's breath away. "I thought you'd gone mad when you said they thought we were together." Callum says, shaking his head just a little bit. 

Ben grins, devilish, as though he suddenly thinks of a plan of some sort. His eyes trail back to Jay and Lola, and it looks as though they aren't even being served yet, Mick and Tracey both on the other side of the bar. "Do you want to have some fun with this?" He asks, moving his chair closer to Callum, the awful squeak of the wooden legs against the floor disguised by the noise of everyone chattering around them. 

Callum leans in. "What kind of fun are you thinking?" He asks, a flirtatious smile spreading over his cheeks. 

"Well." Ben starts. "I was thinking...me and you, tell them they're right. We pretend to start dating, and see how they react." 

Oh. 

_ Oh _ .

Ben's looking up at Callum, expectantly, and maybe it's just the drink taking over his brain, but Callum can't help but agree with Ben. This is happening then. They're really pretending to date.


	3. chapter three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the following two days after the first decision to fake date, and Ben is scared. But after Callum says that he wants to this, just for a bit of fun, what happens the morning after?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i knew this chapter would be long...but not quite this long. it's been written in one day, after not feeling quite myself for the past week. i hope you enjoy it, because i think this might be one of my favourite things i've written in a while. as always, please feel free to leave kudos/comments or maybe even a reblog on tumblr x
> 
> tumblr: @callumsmitchells

It's a beautifully sunny day, albeit the air is cold with a breeze that whistles around. It filters through the trees, and there's a bristle of leaves that can be heard from around the square. Ben's sitting in the car lot, his chair pushed far away from his desk and his legs perching against it, one leg hooking over the other. He's shattered, and his mind is playing last night on repeat, an incessant reminder of his words to Callum.  _ How could he be so stupid? _ His phone buzzes, pulling him away from his thoughts and he picks it up, noticing that it's close to his lunch break now. It's hardly been a busy morning, the phone only ringing once or twice with enquiries, but that's the usual when it's not near pay day. There's a text from Callum, his contact picture lighting up the screen - a photo taken months prior, Callum leaning over the bar at The Vic, moments before knocking over an almost full pint glass with his elbow.

_ can I come over? _ He's asking.

Ben smiles to himself, and he's not even sure why, but it's instinctive, as though Callum has the ability to make Ben skip a heart beat and smile at even just the thought of him.

_ course _ . He texts back, and waits.

It's common for this to happen when Callum gets the chance, when he's not working over the lunch time hour, even though that's not all that often. He'll text Ben, or just show up unannounced, peeking his head around the door of the car lot, checking if the coast was clear. It's only five minutes later when there's a knock at the door, a light tapping, only three - and Ben just knows. He doesn't shout anything out, and there's nothing but silence for a few seconds, and then there's a squeak of the door and Callum's head suddenly appears around the corner, a grin spread across his face. "Can I come in?"

"Yeah." Ben says, pushing his feet off from the desk. "Only if you've bought me food though."

Callum walks through the door, kicking it shut behind him and if it was anyone else, Ben would be angry. "Of course." He says, lifting his arms up to show two boxes, and Ben instantly recognises them as the takeaway ones from his mum's cafe. "Chips. Plenty of salt on yours, because you're weird." 

Ben rolls his eyes, but it's more endearing than anything else. His heart soars at the knowledge that Callum knows exactly how he likes things. 

"Been busy this morning?" Callum asks, throwing a chip into his mouth and twisting the lid to his bottled water open with a crack. 

"Nope." Ben shakes his head. "Just had a few phone calls, but I've got someone coming around later to sort out a new contract with." 

"Boring then." Callum says, and there's a laugh in his throat as though this is normal, as though last night has been completely erased from his memory. 

Ben wishes it was that simple for him. He can't stop replaying it over and over again in his mind, from the second he was hidden from view last night, in the confines of his own bedroom, to the early hour he woke up, the sun only just creeping in through the darkness hanging onto the night. Even now, looking at Callum, his thoughts are dominated by the idea of pretending to be Callum's boyfriend, and Callum pretending to be his. He must have faded off into a daydream, eyes blurry as they focus on the window to the right of the car lot. There's a chuckle, and it half tears him away from his daydream, though his eyes still remain focusing on the window, watching as the leaves blow and twist and bend in the breeze. He's not completely back in the room yet, at least, not until something hits his face, and when he looks down at the desk, there's a limp chip just sitting there. Callum actually threw a chip at Ben's face. He looks up at Callum, who's sitting at the opposite end of the desk, laughing around the edge of his water bottle. There's crinkles at the outer corner of his eyes, and his cheeks are red and glowing. He looks beautiful, Ben can't deny that. 

"What's up with you?" Callum asks, furrowing his eyebrows now and the humour has wilted away slightly. He knows that Callum cares, and it causes warmth in his chest. 

Ben shakes his head, but it's pointless in doing so. He's open like a book, simple for Callum to read, for him to take in every word as if his life depends on it. Callum raises an eyebrow, and it's almost comical. Ben would probably find it hilarious, if there wasn't currently a sickening feeling rising in his stomach. "I'm just thinking about last night." He says, and it's out there now, spoken into the atmosphere, imprinted into Callum's brain. 

"About what?" Callum asks, though they both know the truth. "About us pretending to be together?" 

Ben nods, and he realises that he's suddenly shy. There's no doubt that there's a flush of red making its way up onto his cheeks. 

Callum shrugs, but to nothing in particular. Ben notices his box is empty now, chips now long gone, and then Callum speaks, breaking up the tension. "Do you still want to do it?" 

"Do you?" Ben asks, and yeah it's probably a deflection tactic, because he's too scared to answer the question, though there's part of him that's probably more scared for Callum's answer. 

It's silent for a few moments, and if Ben listens hard enough he might even be able to hear the cogs turning inside Callum's head. It's unbearable, waiting for an answer, and he doesn't even know what he wants to hear, not really. 

"It's just a bit of fun, isn't it?" Callum says. 

_ Yeah. A bit of fun. That's exactly what it is. _

"I don't see why not." Callum continues, and with each word that tumbles from his lips, there's a tightening in Ben's chest, practically restricting him for breathing. "Jay and Lola seem to think we're together anyway, I reckon it'll be fun to wind them up." 

Ben nods. "Yeah." He says, and he's going to be eternally grateful for the fact his voice didn't crack even when it felt like it would. "Yeah, it'll be fun." 

That's it then. It's officially happening.

Callum picks up his box, and stands up, towering over Ben. "I need to go anyway. There's a delivery that needs sorting out in the cellar." 

Ben looks at his own box, and it's only half empty. What a waste. He looks up at Callum, and notices that he's almost near the door now. Probably just as well. The further away he is, the less likely he is to see the blush that litters Ben's cheeks, or hear his heart thumping away in his chest, threatening to burst out into view. Ben speaks, and he has no idea where the confidence suddenly comes from, but it feels natural. There's something that draws him to Callum. "Not even a goodbye kiss?" He asks, and there's a self assured smirk that creeps its way up onto his lips, getting wider and wider as Ben notices that Callum's blushing.  _ He _ made Callum blush. "You wound me." He says, holding his hand over his heart, acting as though he's in pain. 

Callum rolls his eyes, but there's the tiniest evidence of a smile forming on his lips. "You can piss off." He says, and yeah, Ben's right. He can hear the smile in his voice. Callum's hands are at the door handle, and Ben looks down and gets out a folder from a desk in his drawer, assuming that Callum is about to leave. "Ben?" He hears, a voice low and quiet and innocent, almost. 

Ben looks up, and sees Callum still standing there, half out of the car lot, half of his body still inside. Ben raises an eyebrow, questioning, and he sits back in his seat. Callum pouts his lips, and blows a kiss in Ben's direction, knocking him for six. He escapes, the door locking behind him, and blood rushes straight to Ben's head and he's grateful that nobody can see him. 

_ I'm fucked _ . He thinks.  _ I'm actually fucked.  _ He puts his head in his hands, and he can feel the heat on his cheeks. How on earth has Callum blowing a kiss in his direction done this to him? Made him feel all gooey and helpless. 

* * *

It's not until the day after, that the reality of the situation sets in. 

Ben's running late, having slept through his alarm. The sleep was needed, really, after not sleeping at all the night prior with thoughts running through his head inescapable. It's just - today, of all days, he can't be running late. He's got someone coming over to the car lot to look at a Ford he's been trying to sell for months now, at nine in the morning. If he misses that, it's almost guaranteed that the car won't sell. He's just about shoving his shirt on over his shoulders, eating his toast at the same time, trousers on but unzipped and unbuttoned, hanging low on his waist, his white boxers exposed to the world. There's a knock at his front door, and he groans. Today is not the day to be stuck chatting with a neighbour he couldn't care less about, but he's hit with a realisation when his hand wraps around the door handle.  _ Callum _ . It's a day he comes around in the morning, and walks Ben to work. It's a semi regular occurrence, happening most weeks when he's available. Callum goes out and buys a fresh new pint of milk from the Minute Mart, maybe even a loaf of bread, and on his way back, he walks Ben over to the car lot, usually making plans for later that day, or even the weekend. He opens the door, and in the back of his mind he's aware that Callum's about to see him half clothed and in a state of rush, but he doesn't have it in him to care about it. He's more focused on the fact it's quickly getting closer and closer to nine, and he needs to get over to the car lot before the potential buyer shows up to get everything sorted.

Callum's standing there, beaming smile spread across his face, until he looks at Ben and his face contorts into confusion. "Why aren't you dressed?" He asks, looking down at Ben's bare chest, breath hitching when his eyes eventually stop at the opened zip of Ben's trousers, and he can see Ben's boxers so clearly, a faint trail of hair leading down from his belly button to the edge of them. He quickly retracts his eyes, and looks back up at Ben's face, who doesn't look the least bit bothered, in fact, he looks as though he's enjoying Callum looking at him in that way. 

Ben looks down at his body, one hand stretching out above his head and presses it against the doorframe, defining his body even more. "Do you not appreciate it?" He asks, teasing Callum. "I'm running late. Slept through my alarm, didn't I? And I've got a buyer coming at nine, so if you want to walk me to work, you may as well come in and wait whilst I finish getting ready." 

Callum looks down at his watch, and he doesn't even know why, because he doesn't have anywhere to be in a rush. It's probably more for Ben's benefit than his own. "You have twenty minutes." Callum says, and looks back up at Ben with a smile on his face. 

"Make that ten." Ben says, and his hand is resting on Callum's chest as he looks behind his shoulder. Callum should turn, and see what it is that Ben's looking at, but there's something in him that's telling him not to. "I need to be there early." He explains, and then there's silence for a few moments and Callum tries to walk past Ben, into his house, but Ben's eyes are fixated on whatever's happening behind Callum's shoulder. He speaks again. "Callum, trust me."

"Wh-" Callum tries to get out, but his words are soon muffled, and even sooner forgotten about. Because Ben is kissing Callum.

Ben. Kissing Callum. 

It takes Callum by surprise. But then the initial confusion is fading away and turning into a mist of excitement bubbling inside of him, intrigue tugging at his heart strings, and then he finally gets into it, putting his hand on Ben's waist, not even over his shirt - underneath it - so that he's actually touching Ben's bare skin. It's cooling, yet hot at the same time, and it leaves Callum begging for more. It's a connection that Callum never thought he would experience, but it's right here, with Ben. Ben who he's not even dating. Ben who he's pretending to be with, for the sake of a practical joke on two of their friends. There's a tug in his chest, and even more so when Ben pulls away, tilting his head back to its normal position, but his lips are cherry red and so enticing and Callum just wants to pull Ben in again, by his waist, and feel Ben's body against his own and re-attach his lips to Ben's. But he can't. Fuck, he wants this to be real so badly.

"What was that for?" Callum asks and he knows, he's certain, that his entire face is aflame right now.

Ben's hand is still pressing against Callum's chest, and there's a smile on his face as he can feel each individual beat of his heart, and it's beating ridiculously fast, thumping away. Callum's hand is still firmly cupping Ben's waist, thumb running around his skin in circles and it's surely leaving goosebumps in its wake, Callum's coarse skin feeling perfect against Ben's, their bodies just fitting together seamlessly. "Jay's across the road watching us. May as well get started on our little joke." 

Oh. Of course. 

Callum pulls away from Ben's touch, and instantly Ben regrets his words, because he misses Callum's touch against his skin like it's his to miss.

Ben walks back into his house, and buttons up his shirt as Callum follows him, the door clicking shut behind him. "Make that five minutes now, give or take." He laughs, and Callum smiles. It's not bright, like usual, but Ben's laugh makes him smile. "You're a good kisser, by the way. I'll be looking forward to more of that." He slides his shoes on, and pulls the back of them out from where it's digging into his Achilles' heel.

"You are too." Callum says, and his fingers trace his lips, trying to hold onto the remnants of Ben. 

* * *

The day's practically over, the simple nine to five life ending the working day, and as per usual, all the locals are in the pub after shutting up shop everywhere else.

Ben's still in his work clothes, as he walks into the pub, and Callum shakes his head, handing Ben's pre-prepared pint over to him "Glad to see you're properly dressed now." 

"Leave off, you love seeing me naked." Ben grins, and carries his own pint over to the booth. He's bone tired, an ache in his body that he's never felt before, but he certainly wasn't swapping his usual few pints in the local of an evening for anything, even if a relaxing aromatherapy bubble bath does sound perfect right about now.

They're sitting together on one side of the booth, waiting for Jay and Lola to arrive and sit opposite them. It's lucky that they managed to get this booth really, courtesy of Callum being a barman, and even more lucky at the fact he's been given the rest of the evening off, providing it doesn't get too busy that the rest of the bar staff can't handle it. He knows there's a high chance of that happening, so secretly he's planning on drinking just enough so that Mick is forced into not asking him to do the closing hours. 

"Managed to sell the Ford then?" Callum asks, drinking his pint. 

Ben nods. "Yeah. It was only going for cheap anyway, just a little run around really. Some bloke came in and bought it for his daughter. Apparently she's just passed her test anyway, and he didn't want her in his car." 

Callum's hand is resting over the top of the booth, stretching out behind Ben's head. Neither of them notice that it's there, not until Ben leans back, attempting to press his head against the back of the seat, and he feels Callum's arm in its place instead. "Want me to move?" Callum asks, and he's facing Ben properly now, his body twisting in his direction. By default, he can now see the bar as well, and notices that Jay and Lola are standing in a queue waiting to be served. He focuses back on Ben. 

"Do you want to?" Ben asks, and follows Callum's previous eyeline to spot their friends talking to one another. 

"Not what I asked." Callum grins. "Jay's definitely told Lola about this morning. She keeps looking over at us." Ben makes a movement, a jerk of his head to look in their direction, and Callum could strangle him - talk about making it obvious. He puts his hands on Ben's chin and pulls him so that he's forced to look at Callum's face. "Don't look, you idiot." 

"No, I don't want you to move." Ben asks, and he licks his lips. "Better now?" 

Callum nods, and there's a smile on his face as his heart practically skips a beat, their bodies that close now only a thin piece of paper could fit in the gap between them. 

"Can I kiss you?" Ben asks, and he looks so shy, like a whole new person. His voice is quiet, so quiet that Callum wasn't completely sure he heard him correctly, but judging by the fact Ben can't take his eyes off of Callum's lips, he knows full well he heard Ben correctly. 

Callum shuffles closer to Ben, if that is even possible, and his arm that's resting against the back of the booth now comes around to cup Ben's head, holding him in a position where it's impossible to move. He's solely focusing on Ben now, the thought of both Jay and Lola, along with the rest of the pub watching them doesn't faze him at all. It doesn't even enter his head negatively. "You didn't ask me that this morning." He says, and his voice is low, primitive, only for Ben to witness.

Ben shrugs, and licks his lips again. He knows where this is heading. He never knew Callum could be such an expert at flirting. "We didn't have loads of people watching us this morning." 

"No, we didn't." Callum says, and his forehead is against Ben's, their hair tickling each other's skin though they don't mind. "Only Jay." 

"Only Jay." Ben repeats, and his voice is low, matching Callum's. 

They pause for a few moments, but the rest of the pub is muffled out beyond recognition. White noise fills their ears as heat bubbles away between them. Callum's hand is still firmly on Ben's face, holding onto his jaw. It's hot, the tension between them palpable, and Callum inches closer, and witnesses Ben's eyes fluttering closed. He smirks, knowing he has the ability to do that to Ben, that he can make him look like that, even if they're only pretending to date. Because that's what this is. All pretend. Make believe. Not real, not under any circumstances. He has to remember that. But right now, he doesn't care, because Ben looks so fit and he can feel his breath on his skin and his lips are so close and then they're touching. It's mind blowing how something so simple is so perfect. Callum nudges closer, his nose bobbing against Ben's cheek, and Ben takes that as a hint to open his mouth and let Callum in. Callum nearly crumbles, and he's glad that he's sitting down because he definitely wouldn't be able to hold himself up otherwise. There's a grin on Ben's face, and Callum can feel it against his lips as they move together like they were meant to be. His hand falls onto Callum's thigh, and there's a soft moan that tumbles from Callum's throat and out through his mouth, and he's thankful nobody other than him and Ben would be able to hear it. Ben's hand squeezes at his thigh, and then his thumb runs in patterns of circles over the denim material that is stuck to him and then there's a cough, pulling them away from one another. 

Callum releases Ben from his hold, though Ben's hand remains at his thigh. He's not going to complain. No normal person would. Callum picks up his pint, and takes a large gulp, trying to avoid eye contact with Jay and Lola. He can still taste Ben on his lips, and it's driving him insane. 

"You interrupted?" Ben asks, and Callum bites his lips, hiding a soft chuckle that's threatening to escape, though he's sure that his shoulders bobbing up and down is a dead giveaway. 

Callum eventually looks up, and he sees Lola with a wide grin on her face and she looks ready to burst into tears and jump over the table to hug them both. Jay has a look of disgust, but Callum knows that it's because he's seeing his brother kiss someone else. Nobody likes to see that. Behind his eyes though, he looks happy, and it leaves Callum with a pang of guilt, because it's not real. 

"Why didn't you tell us?" Lola asked as she swirls her gin and lemonade with a metal straw. "Jay was just telling me he saw you two this morning." 

Ben shrugs, and looks up at Callum with a gentle smile. That's real, Callum notes, he knows that smile is real. "We didn't want to say anything in case it didn't work out. But it's working out." Ben says, and Callum's shocked, to say the least. Lying comes easy to him, and he's so good at it that it's scary. 

"So you are together then?" Jay asks, raising his eyebrows, mouth hidden by his pint glass.

Callum nods. "Yeah." He says, and his fingers interlock with Ben's as he rests it on top of Ben's hand that is still on Callum's thigh. "We have been for a while, but wanted to keep it hidden for a bit at least." 

"I knew it!" Lola bursts out, her smile getting wider and wider there's a high possibility it'll stay that way if the wind changes direction. "I've said it for weeks that you're together! There's just been little things here and there that have been making me think it, and I was right!"

_ Oh _ . Lola genuinely believes that they've been together for weeks. They haven't done anything out of the ordinary until today though, not consciously anyway. 

"Oh my God." Lola says, as though a thought has suddenly come into her brain. "Double date." She says, and Ben and Callum instantly look at each other, fear in their eyes. "We need to plan one, don't we Jay?" 

Jay laughs, not thinking that she's serious, until he winces over in pain at Lola kicking him underneath the table. "Yeah, can't wait for it." He says, pain evident in his voice as he rubs his calf muscle. 

"Any ideas?" Lola asks, and looks expectantly at Ben and Callum.

"We," Ben says, causing Callum to look at him, wondering what on earth he's about to say now. "Were going to have a film night, at the weekend. Weren't we babe?" 

Callum nods, a look of confusion mixing in with a smile as he looks at Ben. "Yeah. Pizza, popcorn, the full lot."

"Yeah." Ben grins. "That'll be a good double date." Ben falls into Callum's shoulder, and Callum instinctively wraps his arm around Ben, holding them both together. 

It's oddly comforting, and feels natural for him to hold Ben like this and then it hits Callum. They have been acting like a couple for weeks, Lola's right. 


	4. chapter four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's officially their double date night, but what happens at the end of the night that changes the course of Ben and Callum's fake relationship?

Ben’s sitting on the sofa, though that’s not entirely accurate of what he's actually doing. His legs are hanging over the arm of the sofa and dangling down. If Callum wasn’t sorting out takeaway leaflets that he’s had hidden away in a drawer since the day he moved in, he would probably hit his legs and tell him to sit properly. As it is, his mind is elsewhere. It's been playing on his mind all week, ever since Lola first mentioned the words 'double date'. Of course, Ben hadn't exactly helped matters much when he decided to announce that they were already planning a date - one that Callum had no idea about, and he's certain Ben didn't either, until he said it - and that Jay and Lola should join them. 

“Are you actually going to help me choose films, or have you just come over early to wind me up?” Callum asks, watching as Ben makes himself comfortably at home, flicking through the television channels, all the different voices merging into one. 

Ben huffs out a laugh, and spins around so that he's sitting normally, for once. "Why can't we just use Netflix, or something?" He asks, looking at the collection of DVD's that Callum's spread out across the floor. "Who still has DVD's?"

"I do!" Callum says, and yeah, he's offended. Ever since he was little, he's loved the act of collecting DVD's. "It's nice to have something physical." 

Ben rolls his eyes, but there's a smile that's threatening to bubble its way across his lips. He leans over Callum, to get a closer look at the packages in front of them on the floor. His lips are next to Callum's left ear, breath hot and heavy against Callum's skin, little bumps appearing on his skin with the shiver that tingles its way down his spine. "Those." He says, not really taking much notice of what he's actually picking because he doesn't care, not really. He'll watch any film without a fuss. He leans his body even further over Callum, chest pressing against his back as he stretches out to push a couple of films to the side. 

Callum nods, and takes a deep breath the second that Ben pulls away from his body. He puts the films that Ben's chosen on the coffee table, and puts the rest away, inside an ottoman next to the television. When he turns back around, he notices that Ben's resumed his first position, feet dangling over the edge of the sofa again. He doesn't have it in him to complain about it, so he just lets it happen, knowing that once Jay and Lola arrive, he will have to move because there's barely enough room for them all to sit normally. 

"Ben." Callum says, speaking the name out into the abyss. "How do we show we're meant to be together? It's just watching a film together, we've done that loads before now."

Ben laughs, but it's cut short when he sees the worry on Callum's face. He's genuinely worrying about the situation, and Ben laughing probably makes it worse. "Cuddle me." He states. "Just act like you would in a proper relationship."

It's like a kick in the teeth, Ben saying that, because part of Callum wishes that this was a proper relationship. 

* * *

Dusk is falling, the whole of the sky attempting to cling onto the last remnants of the sun, bright and beaming in the sky, its orange glow harsh on the eyes when looking directly at it, but it's beautiful. It's half hidden behind the buildings just opposite the window, and there's a glow on the wall inside, all orange and warm. The darkness is quickly cascading, falling closer and closer to the sky line, threatening to encapsulate the sun in its grasp in lieu of the moon. Other houses are merely silhouettes now, the trees suddenly now not their natural brown and green, but black, hidden in a shadow. It's late, but peaceful. There's somewhat of a calmness to the world, with everyone and everything suddenly slowing down. There's the odd car passing by, but slow and without the horrible burst of a revving engine. There's the odd shout of someone from across the Square, the words unsurprisingly undistinguishable considering there's a large distance between where it's coming from and where they are, but other than that - serenity. 

They're all in Callum's house again. Callum, Ben, Jay and Lola. But this time, there's a striking difference. This time, Callum isn't a bundle of nerves, worrying about how clean everything looks, constantly being on edge that something he's cooking is being burnt, or it's undercooked. No. This time, he's calm. This time, all he has to worry about is keeping up the pretence that he and Ben are dating. It seems to be going well so far. There's no suspicion otherwise. It's almost shocking really, how they're managing to pull this off, especially in front of their two friends, two of the closest people to them. At least, it would be a shock if he didn't keep replaying Lola's words around in his head, thinking constantly about how she thought they had been together for weeks now. It's scary, because it's true - looking back he can see how Lola could think that, in odd moments he remembers, the occasional looks between them and how they could potentially be perceived in a romantic way. 

There's pizza boxes on the table in front of them, with just scraps of leftover pizza left scattered in them now. Ben's sitting next to him, his head resting against Callum's shoulder, focusing on the film playing on the television. As much as Callum wants to get into it, because he loves nothing more than a night in front of the television, he struggles. Ben's head is a weight upon Callum, heavy and endearing. It makes his heart thump at the sheer thought of how close Ben is to him, and instead of focusing on the plot of the Robin Williams film they're watching, he can't help but focus on his breathing, trying to bring it under control and not hitch every single time that Ben moves. 

Sitting next to Ben, is Lola, who is leaning into Jay on the other side of her. It's a push to get all four of them onto the sofa, but with Ben practically half on top of Callum, and Lola replicating that too, they manage to make it work so it's at least somewhat comfortable. Jay's got the popcorn sitting in his lap, being protected by him and he keeps swatting Lola's hand away each time she makes an attempt to get some. He narrows his eyes at her, and mouths  _ mine _ , and Callum huffs out a quiet chuckle that only Ben is able to hear. He looks up at Callum, questioning him silently at first, wondering what he's laughing at because there wasn't a funny moment in the film just now, but then he smiles softly and moves to get even closer to Callum, if that's even possible. He rests his hand against Callum's chest, and before long, Callum can feel Ben's pointer finger tapping against his shirt lightly, to the beat of Callum's heart. He looks down at Ben, and notices that he has eyes on him. Six of them to be precise, because both Jay and Lola tear their eyes away from the screen when Ben speaks. 

"I can feel your heart." He says, and Callum knows those words are meant just for him but Ben doesn't seem to have the ability of speaking quietly. 

Callum smiles softly, and nudges Ben's head down, whispering out a soft, "Shut up." Ben's head is against Callum's chest now, and heat is palpable between the two of them. A laugh stumbles out of Ben's mouth, both heavy and light in equal quantities. For a moment, just for a split second, Callum thinks he can get used to this. He can grow to love having Ben being this close to him, he can grow to want Ben to be around him always. But then there's a loud sound coming from the television and it tears Callum away from those thoughts. Because this isn't reality, nor is it ever likely to be. It's just a joke, a laugh. Nothing more than that, nor is it nothing less.

Moments pass, and Callum remembers the film. He's got a vague memory in the back of his brain telling him he's seen it before, and that it should probably be finishing soon. It's their third one of the night, and probably the last. He moves his head slightly to the left, and notices that Lola is now falling asleep on Jay's shoulder, with Jay threading his fingers through her peroxide blonde hair, right from the root down to the ends, letting it fall against her shoulders in a waterfall like motion until he starts it all again. He watches, and watches and Jay doesn't even notice. He looks calm. He doesn't look like his heart is beating a million miles per hour. He just looks like this is natural, like he does this often enough for it to be normal for him. Callum's never seen it, but then again, why would he? He's never seen Lola fall asleep before. There's a warmth bubbling away inside him, realising that if Jay and Lola act like that, and they're a real couple, then Lola's definitely right, because he probably feels the same way that Jay feels around Lola, that he does around Ben. The credits start to roll, countless names on a list running down the screen, and Jay stirs. Lola's body follows his, unwittingly, and it wakes her up, though she's hardly completely conscious. Her eyes are glossing over, eyelids heavy and there's a pink tinge to her cheeks to suggest she's been asleep. 

"Reckon we'll head back now lads." Jay announces, shuffling his shoes onto his feet. "Before she falls asleep on me again." 

Lola's slow in her movements, but she manages to put her shoes on too, and wraps her jacket around her shoulders. Jay stands, and Lola's clinging onto him in a childlike manner, not wanting to let go. 

"Callum, cheers for having us over." Jay appreciates, clasping his hand around Callum and pulling him in as best he could with Ben in the way. He pulls away, and then taps onto Ben's head, knocking his head back to have him look up at Jay. "You don't do anything I wouldn't, yeah? I'll see you tomorrow." 

"I'm a good boy, Jay." Ben insists, and both Jay and Callum share a look because that's hypocrisy at it's finest. 

With that, they leave, Lola by his side, arms wrapping around his body. 

But Ben doesn't move. He has no intention of moving. Instead, he sits even closer to Callum, one leg trapping Callum's thigh, half on top of Callum. His head is on his chest, and it's comforting. The television is silent, the film long since over and now it's merely just a black screen. Outside, the moon is hanging in the sky, stars dotting about like flecks of white paint on a black canvas. Street lamps litter the streets, illuminating the pavement below them, white orbs circling the tall lights, guiding the way home. Callum's arms are around Ben's body, holding him. It's nice. His fingers slip under Ben's shirt, only two of them, and being able to feel Ben's skin suddenly grounds him. Everything is heightened now, somehow. The late hour brings around relaxation, and Callum craves it. He knows it's nearing midnight now. He doesn't need to look at the clock to tell that, because his body clock is screaming out at him, telling him that he needs to fall asleep soon, because he's doing the early shift tomorrow morning. He's exhausted, but Ben being there makes it all worth it. 

"Didn't get any popcorn." Ben whispers out into the night, his voice soft and his body rumbles with a laugh.

It nearly melts Callum, being able to feel Ben's warmth against him, feeling each individual movement from his body. "Don't think anyone did." He chuckles, voice equally as low. There's no need to be quiet, nobody is there aside from the two of them. But there's something about sharing words barely above a whisper between. It's like they've been forbidden to talk, but they're finally breaking the rules to enjoy each others' company. "Apart from Jay." 

Ben laughs, and his head rolls further and further into Callum's chest. A hand rests against his thigh, and Callum runs his thumb over the material there. It's soothing, for the both of them. 

Callum yawns, his body telling him that it's time now, he definitely has to pull himself back to reality and tear himself away from this perfect, small world he and Ben seem to create whenever they're together. "I'll need to go to bed soon." Callum hushes out and he wants to retract the words the second they leave his lips and drip off into the atmosphere. In an instant, it's all over. The perfection is shattered, like glass onto concrete. 

Ben nods, short and sweet, and pulls himself away from Callum, freeing the both of them. 

It's nice for Callum to have the ability to move freely again, but the second Ben detatches himself from Callum, it's as though he's missing half of himself. 

Ben clears his throat, and stands up. "I'll just nip to the toilet and then I'll get out of your way." He says,  _ fuck, Callum's really messed this one up. _

Callum watches as Ben walks to the bathroom, the darkness hiding his body the further away he walks. He busies himself, trying to not make it obvious that he's longing after Ben, missing him when he's not near. He puts the scraps of pizza in the bin, and leaves the boxes on the side, ready to go out in the rubbish bin in the morning. There's a clatter as he puts cups in the sink and runs the water, and the noise is an unwelcome clash as his head aches suddenly, his mind racing as he regrets ever saying anything to Ben. He would rather still be sitting on the sofa, cuddling each other, even if it lasted the entire night, than spending all that time alone, regretting the fact he made Ben leave. He sighs, and walks into his bedroom, his body aching. All he wants now, is to sleep. Ben knows his way out, and he'll probably shout out that he's leaving in a couple of moments. He strips off, down to just his boxers, just as he usually would to sleep. He grabs a hold of the sheets, pushing them back to make way for him getting comfortable in the bed, and then he realises. 

Ben's there. 

Ben's in Callum's bed, curling in on himself under the sheets. He's sleeping already, by the looks of it, his chest expanding and then falling again with every breath. He's on his side, and Callum's overwhelmed. He can't kick him out, not when he's already sleeping. There's a soft smile growing on Callum's face, like sunflowers when they face the daylight. He crouches down and falls onto his bed. There's room enough for the both of them, so it's not too bad. It's warm, enticing, and Callum's never felt this at home in his own bed. He turns so that he's on his side, facing Ben, though all he can see is the expanse of his back and the faint hairs that are at the nape of his neck. They aren't touching, not even their legs skimming each other. Ben's like a personal radiator, heat radiating off of his body, and something in him just pulls Callum closer and closer to him - until his lips press against the dip in Ben's spine, warmth from Callum's barely open mouth on Ben's shirt. He pulls away as quickly as he presses there, regretting it instantly, but he's grateful for the fact Ben's asleep and definitely didn't feel it. He's at the edge of the bed - his own bed - trying to stay as far away from Ben as possible, a horrible feeling in the pit of his stomach bubbling away, and he recognises it.  _ No _ . He thinks, repressing the thought.  _ He's my friend. That's all. _

There's a silence in the room, deafening, exhausting. There's a ringing in Callum's ears, and he can feel his heart beating, to the point he's surprised he can't see it beating out of his body. And then there's a noise. A shuffle, the familiar sheets rustling under movements and Ben's facing Callum now, his eyes open and bright in the opaqueness of the room. There's a breath, and it whistles out into obscurity, far beyond Callum's reach. "I felt that." Ben whispers out, and there's a crack in his voice. 

Callum turns his head, and watches as Ben visibly cringes, contorting his face in the dead of the night. There's a flush to his cheeks, and Callum can feel his cheeks burning too. "We can stop this." He says, and there's a wobble to his voice, threatening to expose him. "If that's what you want?" 

He watches, and Ben's silent, staring up at the ceiling as if there's something interesting up there, and then he closes his eyes. "No." He says, and then he's turning his head so that he's facing Callum, both of them looking at each other, concentration in their eyes as they look as though they're attempting to read the others mind. Callum's about to question him, ask if he's sure, when Ben speaks once more. "I'm going to do something, but tell me if it's too much. Please?"

Callum nods, and there's the pressure of a gulp in his throat, trying desperately to escape. Ben shuffles closer to Callum, their shoulders touching, but only just. A hand presses against Callum's cheek, forcing Callum to look in Ben's direction without pulling away. Then it happens. Ben presses his lips to Callum's, soft and gentle and at the opposite end of the spectrum to their previous kisses, No, this one isn't rushed. It isn't in the heat of the moment, trying to prove something to others. This is sickly sweet, and causes tingles in Callum's fingertips and toes. Ben pulls away, and Callum instantly follows, wanting more but Ben's hand stops him in his tracks, thumb running over Callum's chin, the tip just faintly touching his bottom lip. "Was that okay?" Ben asks, and he's shy now, eyes hooded with his eyelids, not wanting to look Callum in the eye. 

Callum doesn't speak, not at first. He just leans forward, invading Ben's space, begging for more. "Perfect." He whispers out as his lips touch Ben's again, and his hand makes its way to Ben's waist. 

He wants more, they both do. It's obvious in the way that they touch, even more so in the way that they kiss. It's lust, tinged with something more. Ben moves, his thumb repeatedly running over Callum's cheek, and then he's lifting himself up, so that he's hovering over Callum's body, the sheets falling off of him, exposing his body. He's nervous, they both are. Callum's hands set out on their travel of Ben's body, large and hot and Ben never wants them to leave his skin. It's grounding, having Callum touch him. His thighs are at either side of Callum's waist, and he's leaning primarily on one arm, his muscles twitching under the pressure. There's a tingle to his lips, and Ben smiles, pulling back to watch Callum.

His lips are cherry red and plump, his eyes have a darker shade of blue casting over them, and his fingers are still red hot against Ben's skin, hooking under his shirt. Callum holds the cloth with his pointer finger and thumb, and pulls at it lightly, hoping that Ben takes the hint. He does, thankfully, and Ben swoops down to embrace Callum in yet another kiss, unwilling to be apart. He starts it off, lifting his shirt over his head from his shoulders, and then Callum continues, exposing Ben's body completely and throwing it onto the floor. 

"Are you sure?" Callum asks, his voice low with Ben's lips against his neck, nipping at his skin. 

Ben pulls back, and looks at Callum. "Course I am." He says, a smile on his face and Callum knows it's real. "Do you want to do this?" He asks, and Callum's heart beats even faster, he's sure of it. 

He nods, slowly at first, and then he speaks. "More than anything." 

Ben leans back down, and kisses Callum softly. 

Callum's hands drop from Ben's waist to the band of his boxers, hanging low and enticing. They dip into the heat of his boxers, only his knuckles dipping into that almost forbidden area, and Ben lets out a low hiss. It's hot, and Callum has to pinch himself to believe for just one second that he is the one that has the ability to make Ben sound like that. 

They've got time. There's no rush in anything they do. But this, tonight? It's perfect. For once, Callum knows that it's real. He knows that the feelings he has, are prominent in Ben too. This is for nobody but themselves, and they're going to enjoy it. 


	5. chapter five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the morning after they've had sex, and someone else finds out about Ben and Callum. Emotions are heightened, and an argument ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> writing this was a rollercoaster in itself, which reflects the chapter. i'm moving back to uni in three weeks, but i'm hoping to write the remaining chapters before then, so i can update this fic regularly. 
> 
> i hope you enjoy this rollercoaster/turning point of a chapter - sorry in advance x 
> 
> (warning for smut)
> 
> tumblr: @callumsmitchells

Sun breaks through the curtains, a beam of light illuminating the wall, and then falling down onto the bed in a long line. Callum's arms are around Ben's body, holding their bodies taut together. Ben's head is resting on Callum's chest, sleeping soundly, his breath exhaling softly onto Callum's bare skin. He looks so peaceful, sleeping there. Like Callum was made solely for Ben to rest his head on him. Clothes have been long since forgotten, sitting on the floor in a slump, creases most definitely having formed on them overnight. It would be relaxing for Callum, if there wasn't a sick feeling eating away in the pit of his stomach. Last night was fun. It was good - amazing, even. Callum let all his inhibitions fade away with every kiss that Ben pressed to his skin, with every touch of his fingers on Callum. They had sex, and it was glorious. It was all soft touches and soft kisses and quiet moans in the dead of night, the arching of backs and mouths gaping open as they worked their way through orgasms. Last night, it was perfect. But now, it's almost sickening.

Callum looks down at Ben's body resting on him. He's stirring in his sleep, and Callum knows that he's close to waking up. There's a red mark on his neck, small but certainly visible, even with Callum's bleary eyes of the morning. He's got no idea when that happened exactly, but he knows he's the perpetrator. His fingers trace over it lightly, trembling against Ben's skin. It's warm, homely. Their legs are together, under the covers, linking together as one. The feel of Ben's skin against his own is one that he never wants to forget. Callum's fingers are still tracing the mark on Ben's neck, and he must be able to feel it, because his breath hitches in the last moments of his slumber. He turns his head, nose burrowing into Callum's skin, right next to his nipple. There's the warmth of his open mouth against his skin, and it instantly reminds Callum of the previous night, Ben leaving searing open mouthed kiss all over his body. 

"What time is it?" Ben groans, and Callum's fingers trace faint patterns over his back and down his spine now. His voice is deep and husky and it sets Callum aflame. 

"Early." Callum says. "The suns only just come up." 

Ben melts even further into Callum, stretching his legs out as best he can, until there's a faint sound of a crack in the bedroom, and his legs start to shake. "I'm tired." He mumbles, and Callum chuckles out softly into the abyss. 

"That's what you get for keeping me awake." Callum jokes, and instantly regrets it, feeling his heart plummet down to his stomach, like he's on a rollercoaster and half his body has been left at the top, and the rest goes with him on the descent. 

Ben looks up, resting his chin on Callum's chest, and there's a small grin finding its way onto his lips. He stretches up, balancing on his elbows and presses a kiss to Callum's lips, a tingling sensation being shared between them. It's soft, no heat or pressure. It's just them, and the twittering of the early morning birds in the trees outside. "Don't act like you didn't enjoy it." Ben teases, when he pulls back from the kiss. 

Callum shakes his head, a laugh bubbling out from his lips. Ben sits up, the covers falling down around him, exposing his body. "Are you leaving?" Callum asks, hands making their way to Ben's waist. 

"Do you want me to?" Ben asks in retaliation, voice deep with lust. He licks his lips, and untangles his legs with Callum's, freeing them both. He puts his legs at either side of Callum's waist, and his arms match up with that position further up Callum's body. 

"No." Callum says, but it's barely above a whisper. 

"No?" Ben repeats, raising an eyebrow as he sinks down, his face merely centimetres away from Callum's now. The tone of his voice matches Callum's perfectly, soft and delicate and breathless. "Well then. I reckon I could stay." He finally presses his lips to Callum's, the elder mans arms moving from their position at his waist to now covering the expanse of his back. It's slow. They're taking their time. Yes, the sun has risen and people are waking up for their breakfast before a commute to work or to school, but right now it's just them, alone. The rest of the world doesn't matter, as long as they hold each other. 

Callum's hands fall, fingers fumbling as they trace down Ben's already arching back, right down his spine, and eventually landing on the curve of his bottom. Ben pulls away from the kiss only slightly, aiming to catch his breath. Callum uses the release to speak. "Do you want this again?" He asks, because he has to be sure, he doesn't want to ruin anything.

Ben hums, and stretches out to the bedside table, picking up the bottle of lube and a condom that they left there last night. He passes them to Callum, and resumes their kiss, mumbling out "More than anything." against Callum's lips. 

Callum grins, because how could he not? He drizzles lube onto his fingers and suddenly he's overwhelmed, because this is happening again, but this time they aren't fueled by sleep deprivation or a few drinks. This is happening because they both want it to happen. He works Ben open, at first with only one finger. Ben is floating above him, pulling away from the kiss as he feels the pressure of Callum. His mouth gapes open, and he loses all the saliva from his mouth, his mouth suddenly becoming barren dry. "More." He groans, letting his head fall forward, already exhausted. Sweat drips over his forehead, hair falling down to stick to it. Callum, with his free hand, brushes the hair away from Ben's eyes, and lets his thumb rest against his cheek, skin staining a shade of pink. Ben leans down once more, and kisses Callum again, a smile growing on his lips as he can feel Callum moving his hand again. He presses two fingers inside, and Ben groans one more, biting down on Callum's bottom lip in reaction. Callum chuckles, and stretches out his fingers, widening Ben. The younger man retracts, pulling away from the kiss as he arches his back, needing - wanting - to feel more, to feel everything. Callum pulls out his fingers, almost entirely, before he puts them back in again, filling Ben up. A wail escapes from Ben's lips, and his body jerks. 

"Yeah?" Callum breathes out, his voice heavy. He doesn't have to explain what he means for Ben to understand fully.

Ben nods and rocks back on Callum's fingers. He finds the condom, and tears open the packet, rolling down on Callum's dick. Callum himself moans at the touch, feeling Ben's hand wrapping around him. Ben grins, knowing he can elicit such a guttural sound from Callum at just the slightest of motions.  _ That's good to know.  _ Ben moves, lining himself up with Callum, and he pushes down. He felt this in the night previously, but something just feels different now. It feels otherworldly, almost. Callum's hands are on his hips, and Ben's head is tilting back, facing the ceiling, though his eyes are screwed tightly shut so he can't actually see anything. He's stationary for a moment, feeling everything. The heat from Callum, feeling completely full, the touch of his fingers on Ben's skin. It's everything. 

He presses his hands to Callum's chest, and leans down to take Callum's bottom lip between his. He doesn't usually do this, not during sex. He's not someone who enjoys the added bonus of those feelings, but with Callum he wants all of that and more. He takes his time, spreading his fingers out across the expanse of his chest, and then he starts to move. He lifts up with a roll of his body, so that just the tip of Callum's penis is still inside him, and then pushes back down. Their lips are tangled together in an embrace, with soft moans pouring out between them. Callum spreads out his legs, and tightens his hold on Ben, pushing into him, and helping Ben push down. It's wordless, apart from soft whispers and moans. Ben expertly rolls his body, knowing exactly what buttons to press, and Callum laps it up. He watches as Ben's face flushes pink, and his hair falls in front of his eyes, strays getting caught up on his eyelashes. The sun from the cracks in the curtains flood over Ben, painting him in the light, and to Callum he looks almost ethereal. He falls forward, curling around Callum's body, bones aching. He looks so innocent, and Callum lets out a soft chuckle, pressing a swift kiss to his temple, before he twists their connected bodies, not once escaping from Ben. The younger man is now pressing against the mattress, and Callum is covering him. Ben's legs hook around Callum's body, holding them together, though Callum doesn't want to let go either. His lips are against Ben's neck, back in the same position as last night, lips and teeth clashing against the red patch on his neck that Callum spent the morning admiring. He's adding to the collection, and Ben loves it. He loves something else too - or someone, but he can't say that, can't throw all of this away. Callum takes over the movements, and he loves it. He loves being able to make Ben huff out little moans with each breath he takes. With his lips against Ben's neck, he can hear it all, and even feel the noises bubbling away in his throat. Callum grins, and moves his body, pushing in and then pulling out in a rhythmic tempo, feeling Ben tighten around him. There's a shortness of breath that comes from Ben, and his legs push Callum into his body even further, needing him there. 

"Callum." He breathes out, fingers threading through Callum's hair, pulling just a little bit. Callum moves his head so he can see Ben's face, and its contorted, beads of sweat forming from his brows. "I'm close." He hums. 

Callum smiles, and traps Ben's lips with his own. He speeds the tempo up, and swallows Ben's groans, letting them mingle with his own. There's a guttural sound and a tug on Callum's hair as Ben comes, feeling a weight in his pelvic area, and then the stickiness against his stomach. Callum slows himself down, pleasure overcoming him too as he spills into the condom, moving his lower body as he works them through it all. Ben's legs become loose and jelly-like, and he relaxes, running his fingers lightly up and down Callum's spine. Callum pulls out, and ties the condom in a knot, placing it inside a tissue. Ben wipes himself down, though he has no energy for it. Their legs are entwining once more, and Callum finds himself being held by Ben this time. 

The sun is still prominent, and now even brighter, lighting up as much of the room as possible from the small gaps in the curtains. Ben's almost falling asleep again, and Callum chuckles softly, pressing two fingers to his cheek and turning his face so that he's facing Callum now. Callum kisses Ben softly, slowly. There's no heat to it, it's just relaxing, peaceful. 

"Don't let me sleep." Ben says, breaking the silence of the room. "I've got work. Jay'll kill me if I don't show up."

Callum chuckles, and kisses Ben one last time. "Get up then. I'll make us breakfast. Bacon sarnie do ya?" 

Ben hums, but makes no move to get up out of bed. "Maybe five more minutes?" He asks cheekily. 

"And then in five minutes, it'll be another five? Come on, I'm not being responsible for you not shifting any cars today." Callum says, tapping Ben's side. He clambers over Ben, and gets out of bed, standing as naked as the day he was born, until he searches for boxers in his bedside drawer. He turns to face Ben, once he's partially clothed, or at least covering his manhood, and he holds his hands out for Ben to take, dragging him up.

* * *

It's lunch now, the sun flying high in the sky, beaming right down on Walford. There's a crispness to the air, threatening to get colder as the day progresses, but the sun remains a figure of warming people up when it's not hidden by the clouds. Ben locks the door to the car lot, and pockets the key, walking over to the cafe. It's been a successful morning, by all counts. Contracts signed, meetings scheduled, and a car bought already. He pushes open the door to the cafe, and sees his mum at the till, handing some change into Callum's hand. 

"Hi love." Kathy smiles. "Didn't hear you leave this morning?"

Ben smiles shyly at Callum, who's standing there with a takeaway cup of tea in his hands. "I stayed out." Ben explains. "Tea and full English, please mum."

She writes down his order, and hums. "Staying in?" She asks, looking back up at him. 

Ben looks at Callum, and raises an eyebrow, questioning him silently. Callum nods, and Ben speaks again. "Yeah. Staying in." 

They walk towards the back of the cafe, sitting in the corner so they’re partially hiding from the view of Kathy. Callum feels guilty instantly, because he just knows she can read between the lines and see the looks he and Ben share. It’s not just a joke being played on their friends anymore, not if Kathy thinks they’re together. Ben doesn’t seem to care much though, because his legs are soon entwining with Callum’s underneath the table, as he sits back with a smile on his face. 

“Good morning?” Callum asks. 

Ben nods earnestly. “You know it was.” He grins.

Callum looks away, suddenly taking an interest in the people around them. He shakes his head with a soft look of appreciation on his face, and a chuckle threatening to bubble out of him. “I actually meant at work.” He explains. 

“Well.” Ben says, leaning back in his seat, using his foot under the table to nudge Callum’s thighs open. “Not  _ quite  _ as good as early this morning, but I’ve sold a car and sorted out things that needed sorting.” 

“Guess I don’t have to be blamed for you not shifting any cars then.” Callum teases. 

Kathy walks over to them, putting a plate and a mug in front of Ben. She looks between them, her eyebrows furrowed only slightly, but there's a smile on her face. When she leaves again, without a word, Ben chuckles lowly, shaking his head from side to side. 

Callum contorts his face in confusion, raising an eyebrow, narrowing his eyes in Ben's direction. That just makes Ben laugh more. He reaches over the table, and locks his pinky finger with Callum's. It's grounding. A soft touch that Callum doesn't expect at all. "I think she's just figured out where I stayed last night." Ben explains. 

"Oh." Callum says. "Do you mind?"

Ben takes a sip of his tea, and closes his eyes momentarily. "No. Do you?"

Callum thinks for a moment, because this is only happening because they are playing a joke on Jay and Lola. But now it's real. Kind of, anyway. He has real feelings, and they're getting more and more prominent with every sunrise that comes around. They've had sex now - twice. It's not a prank any more, not to Callum. But Kathy isn't aware of the origins of them. She doesn't know that they're aren't together. All she sees, is Ben holding Callum's hand, the looks being shared between them. All she knows, is that her son didn't come home last night, and that he definitely stayed at Callum's. "No." He says, eventually, though there's something inside of him screaming out that he's lying to himself.

Ben smiles, and tightens his hold on Callum's hand for a moment, before he lets go so that he's able to eat. 

Callum waits, and there's a calmness between them. It's quiet, though the cafe is busy, and everyone's talking, but he somehow manages to drown them all out. His heart beats fast, and he's petrified Ben can hear it, because he certainly can. "I need to go anyway." He says, and he feels light headed all of a sudden. "I'm meant to be working through lunch. Stock taking." He stands, and Ben's eyeline follows him. 

He moves to walk away, but Ben's hand flies out and grabs hold of his hand, their fingers entwining for a second. He pulls away slowly, his hand on Callum's for as long as he can possibly drag out. "No goodbye kiss?" He asks, teasingly. "Come on, we haven't kissed for...four hours."

Callum chuckles softly. He's ridiculous. This situation is ridiculous. He leans down, hooking his pointer finger under Ben's chin, and pressing his thumb lightly just underneath his bottom lip. Swiftly, he presses a kiss to Ben's lips. Short, but sweet, and leaving him wanting more. "I'll see you later, yeah?" Callum asks, when he stands back up and straightens himself out. 

"Yeah." Ben whispers out softly, watching as Callum walks away. 

Ben's sitting alone for only a few short moments after he hears the door to the cafe shutting behind Callum. He's eating a slice of toast, when his mum slides out the chair Callum was previously sitting on, and sits down herself. "Yes mother?" He asks, looking across the table at her. 

"When were you planning on telling me about you and Callum?" She enquires, putting a tea towel on the table to free her hands, though she rests them on top of it. 

"Nothing to tell you about." Ben says, but there's a growing smile that's threatening to expose him. 

Kathy raises an eyebrow, and slaps at Ben's hand. "You let him kiss you in public. That ain't nothing, Ben. I haven't seen you like this in a long time."

Ben smiles softly. "I think we're just seeing where it goes." He explains, but he's not even sure himself, not now. "And yes, before you ask. I did stay at his last night." 

Kathy smiles, and holds on to Ben's hand. "As long as you're both happy." She says. "And you can let him know, that he can come around for dinner tonight. I'll cook." 

"Is that an official invitation?" Ben chuckles. 

"Yes." Kathy says, standing up. She puts her hand on Ben's shoulder, and squeezes. "I'm happy for you love." 

* * *

Callum's pacing outside. It's later in the day now, and the sky is fading to a navy blue as the day turns into the evening. His phone is in his hand, a text conversation with Ben lighting up the screen. He's already sent him a text, letting him know that he's standing outside and that he can't possibly knock on the door, or even ring the bell. He's anxious, and possibly ready to strangle Ben for agreeing to this stupid meal. Guilt swarms through him, and he's ready to walk away, but the door cracks open, and Ben's grinning stupidly at him. 

"Hey." Ben smiles and Callum hates, hates that hearing Ben's voice makes him so fuzzy and warm inside. "You could've just come in."

"I can't believe you're making me do this." Callum says, narrowing his eye in Ben's direction. 

Ben steps outside, and shuts the door behind him, so that nobody inside will be able to hear them. "She saw us. I can hardly deny it, can I? How would that look to Jay and Lola?"

Callum tilts his head back and looks up to the sky, exhaling a breath and watching it materialise and swirl out into the atmosphere above him. "Who's inside?" He asks, hoping it's not the entire extended family. 

"Just my mum." Ben says. "Everyone else is out, at the Vic. I told her I didn't want a big fuss, and it was fine being just us. Please, Cal."

Callum sighs. "Fine. But you're the one sorting out any mess if it all goes wrong." 

Ben grins, and nods, accepting his fate. "Come on then." He says, holding out his hand for Callum to take, wrapping their fingers together in a warm embrace. They walk into the house together, and Callum puts his arm around Ben's shoulder, a smile on his face as he's instantly hit with the smell of home cooked food, nostalgia running through him. 

Kathy's lovely, she really is. She puts Callum at ease, and makes him laugh until he's red in the face, telling him stories of Ben as a child, how he loved to dance in her high heels, and how she once caught him putting red lipstick on all over his face, wearing her pearl necklace and smiling at himself in the mirror. It's surprisingly easy, fitting into the family setting. Callum's arm is placed protectively over the back of Ben's chair, occasionally moving his hand so that his fingers are massaging the nape of Ben's neck. Ben looks at Callum with a softness in his eyes and a bright smile on his face. It's normal. Shockingly normal. 

But that makes it worse for Callum. By the end of the evening, there's a dim buzzing noise incessant in his head, and he feels like nothing but a fraud. He never wanted it to go this far. It was only supposed to be a joke between friends, but now families and feelings are involved and he's regretting ever agreeing to it. He's standing at the door, having already kissed Kathy on the cheek, thanking her for a lovely evening and telling her to enjoy her night. He can hear Ben's laughter, and can just about make out Kathy telling him to "Keep your Callum around." If Ben hadn't already offered to walk Callum back over to his flat in front of Kathy, he probably would've left already. 

"Ready to go?" Ben asks, walking into the corridor and shrugging his leather jacket on over his shoulders. 

Callum nods, and winces because his head is already banging. "Yeah." 

"Told you that wine'd go straight to your head." Ben laughs. He opens the door and lets Callum leave into the night first. 

Callum turns and faces Ben, his hands are shoved in his trouser pockets. "I don't know how you're both perfectly fine after it. I think I've already started the hangover." 

Ben laughs. "We'll probably feel it tomorrow." He watches Callum, and notices that his smile doesn't light up his face like it usually does. They're nearing Callum's flat now, and Callum gets his keys out of his pocket, hooking his finger through the loop of the key ring, so the metal is dangling and clashing together making a tinny sound. "What's wrong?" He asks, barely metres away from Callum's front door. 

"Nothing." Callum says, leaning against the concrete bricks of his front garden wall with folded arms. They both know that's a lie. 

Ben scoffs out a laugh, and mimics Callum's stance. "Come on." He says, nudging Callum's arm with his own elbow. "I'm your boyfriend, you have to tell me."

And that was it. Something within Callum snaps, and he lets out the most incredulous laugh, eyes shooting daggers at Ben. He pushes himself off of the concrete wall, and unfolds his arms, freeing himself from his own constraints. The alcohol in his system only acts as an accelerant to the fury that burns deep inside him. Words bubble up inside him, until he explodes, tears welling up in his eyes. "Expect you're not my boyfriend." He venomously spits. "You're not my boyfriend, and I am not yours. We're pretending. This whole fucking thing is make believe. And now we're not only lying to our best friends, we're lying to your mum. Your own flesh and blood. Or does that not bother you at all?" A tear falls down from his eye and marks his skin. He quickly wipes it away, not wanting to show Ben that he's at the point of actually crying, and he turns away from him. He unlocks the door with a click, and slams it shut behind him, blocking out all the shouts from Ben. 

There's silence once again, and Ben's left alone with only solitude as a friend. He looks up at the night sky, and notices a scattering of stars hanging up there, looking so small in the vastness of the above. He puts his hands over his face, and muffles a scream into them, needing to let it out. Ben sighs eventually and turns away, walking back towards his house, back in the direction he's just come from, with the intention of getting drunk and forgetting any of this even happened.

He's ruined everything, all because he's gone and fallen in love with Callum. 


	6. chapter six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Callum are lost without each other, following their argument, but they soon try to work things out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the penultimate chapter! i'm so sorry i've been gone for so long, my life has truly been hectic - but i'm aiming to get this fic finished in the next few weeks 
> 
> as always, i hope you enjoy, and please feel free to leave kudos and comments x
> 
> tumblr: @callumsmitchells

Ben's lazing across the sofa, the position of his body in a slump. One of his hands is against his chest, thumb stroking lightly at the material of his shirt, the other dangling low and just reaching the carpet. One leg is up and spread all the way across the sofa, reaching the other side, the heel of his foot resting upon the arm of the seat, whilst his other leg is down and stopping him from falling if he rolls over at any point. The television is playing, and some old show that Ben vaguely remembers from when he was a child is crackling through the screen, but bar looking in its direction, he's taking no notice of it. His mind is a mess. All he thinks about is Callum this, Callum that. He's numb to everything else, really.

It's been a week. It's been one whole week, seven entire days since Ben and Callum had their argument. Since then, Ben's been hiding away, only ever leaving the house for work, and then coming home with his head hung low and his feet heavy like concrete. Everyone arounds him believes they've broken up, and in a way, they have - but this is even worse than that, because Ben's lost Callum as a friend first and foremost. He's heartbroken, completely at a loss without him. He misses being able to text Callum whenever he wants, even if just to tell him a stupid joke. He misses drinking with him. He misses watching films with him. He misses just being in Callum's presence, and he misses how happy Callum makes him. 

Lola's standing at the kitchen door leading into the living room, watching Ben with a forlorn look on her face. She unfolds her arms, and swings around so she's now back in the kitchen, shaking her head. Jay and Kathy are sitting at the table. "Callum told us they had an argument." Lola explains, her voice low so that Ben doesn't hear. Not that he probably would anyway, considering he's been zoning out of every conversation people have been trying to hold with him all week. "But he's still refusing to tell us what it's all about. It's driving me insane. They're both so unhappy, but neither of them are taking that step to talk to each other again." 

Kathy shakes her head. "I'm tempted to just bang their heads together." She says. "He's been like this for days, moping about."

"Callum's the exact same." Jay says. "He's acting like he's fine, but you can tell he's not okay. Even at work, he's mixing up orders, dropping things, getting angry. Whatever they argued about, it's affecting both of them really badly."

Lola nods. "They aren't the same without each other." She concludes.

They're silent for a moment, trying to mull things over in the minds. 

"I can hear you, you know?" Ben shouts from the other room, his voice dull and empty of emotion.

Three heads jerk up at the same time, and they watch Ben as he sits upright for what feels like the first time in days. He's got bags under his eyes, all brown and swollen. He's barely shaven, his beard now long in length and thick for the first time. 

"Love." Kathy says, her best caring mum voice now in full swing. "We're just worried about you. You aren't sleeping, you're barely leaving the house. It's not normal, darling. I'm sure that whatever you and Callum argued about wasn't so bad that you can't sort it all out. Forget your relationship, just don't go ruining your friendship with him, because above all, that's what really matters." 

Ben scoffs, and shakes his head, standing up in a swift movement that causes a crack at his knees. "You don't know nothing." Ben spits venomously. "So just leave it. All of you." He storms off upstairs, thundering steps ricocheting through the house with every anger filled movement he leaves behind. 

* * *

Kathy's standing behind the till in the cafe, watching people coming and going. It's the busy morning rush, albeit now the end of it, and through it all, Callum's been sitting in the back of the cafe, half hidden from view, nursing a cup of tea that has surely long since gone stone cold. He looks lost too, exactly like Ben. His hair is flat and obscuring his forehead. He's got bags under his eyes, matching with Ben's, and he's sitting in a slouch, his shoulders hunched over, his posture a stark contrast to his usual one. He yawns, and Kathy can see his eyes start to water afterwards. She picks out a tissue or two from a box she keeps next to the till, and walks over to him, noting that the cafe is now nearly empty following the morning swarm of busy workers and school children. She drags out the seat that's opposite Callum on the same table, and sits down without him looking up. She puts a comforting hand on his wrist, and passes him the tissues. He takes it gratefully, and smiles when he realises that it's from Kathy - though the smile doesn't reach his eyes like it usually would. 

"I'm assuming this is all because of my son." Kathy says, breaking the silence between them.

Callum fumbles out a scoffing laugh, wiping his eyes dry of any remaining tears that escape. "Is it really that obvious?" Callum asks. "How is he?" Typical Callum, wondering how other people are even when he's in such a state himself.

"Exactly like you." She confirms with a warming smile on her face. "He's barely eating, barely sleeping. Only leaving the house to go to work, and then coming home straight away. It's like he's lost without you."

Callum's eyes fill with tears once more, and he swiftly dabs them with the tissue.

"Can you really not sort it out?" Kathy asks. "What's so bad that you two can't even be friends?"

Callum lets out a sigh, and his body slumps even further, a wave of nausea curling throughout him. "It's my fault." He admits. "I need to be the one to sort it out. Whether Ben wants to sort it out himself, is another question. I hope he does. It's like I'm missing part of me without him."

Kathy places a hand on Callum's, enveloping him. "Well between me and you. Ben's not gone to work today, so if you really want to sort it all out, I'd suggest going over to the house to speak to him whilst everyone's out." 

Callum looks down at the table and inhales a shaky breath. "Yeah." He says. "I really should. Is it okay if I go now?" 

Kathy nods, a warming smile on his face that only a mother could give. "Course it is." She stands, following Callum's own movements, and leans up to press a kiss to his cheek. "Let yourself in, the door's unlocked." 

* * *

Callum's standing on the concrete outside of the house, his hand dangerously close to the door handle. His hand is floating over the metal, his mind running at a million miles an hour, trying to decide if he should just walk in, or knock. He shakes his head with his eyes shut, and feels the cool metal against his skin as he pushes it down and opens the door. There's a squeak from the hinges, and Callum inwardly cringes, because he feels like he's trespassing, even though he has permission to just walk in. 

"Ben?" He calls out, though his voice is not nearly as loud as he thought it was. 

He walks into the living room, and sees Ben spread out on the sofa, head resting on his fist, watching the television. It overwhelms Callum, seeing Ben after a week. It's probably the longest they've ever gone without speaking to each other. "Ben." Callum breathes out.

Ben looks up at him through hooded eyelids and fluttery eyelashes, exhaustion clearly evident on his face. "What do you want?" He asks, sadness in his voice. 

Callum's heart pangs with an ache of hurt, knowing that he's the one responsible for Ben feeling like this. He crouches down, so he's now face to face with Ben. His eyes are stinging, tingles of remaining tears hurting him. "Your mum let me in. I want to apologise, for everything." 

Ben looks everywhere but at Callum, his eyes scanning around the room in a desperate attempt to find something even remotely interesting, because he can't bring himself to look directly into Callum's ocean blue eyes. Callum places his hand on Ben's cheek, warm and inviting, and Ben nearly melts. 

"I'm sorry." Callum whispers. "I shouldn't have made a big deal out of it. I just got scared, terrified that I'd ruin everything for us. I guess I did in the end." He shrugs. 

Ben sits up, swinging his legs around so they reach the floor. He shakes his head lightly. "I'm the one that should be apologising. I should never have suggested it, it was a stupid idea."

"It was fun." Callum admits, because honestly, it was. "I guess I just got scared, but I don't regret any of it - only the argument." 

Ben smiles softly, because he knows what Callum's trying to say. He looks down at his lap, thumbs twisting around the other, before he looks back up at Callum shyly. "Are we good?" He asks.

Callum intakes a sharp breath through his nose, and smiles. "Yeah." He confirms. "We're good." 

They share a look, eyes scanning eyes, but not for long, because Ben launches himself at Callum, pulling the older man in for a hug. They've both missed this. Ben's fingers thread through the hair at the back of Callum's head, holding them close. Callum's head is buried in Ben's shoulder, breathing him in. It's relaxing, a comfort, to be able to hold like this. Ben releases his hold on Callum, and Callum remains in the hug for a moment or two, wanting to savour it after a long week of not being able to do this. When he eventually pulls away, his hands are still encapsulating Ben's ribs, warm hands melting into his skin. Ben's hands remain in the thin parts of Callum's hair, feeling it under his fingertips, and they're just looking at each other, smiles on their faces, genuinely happy. Something comes over Ben, and he leans forward, breath swirling out of his nostrils as it hits Callum's skin. His lips press against Callum's, soft and peaceful and grounding. There's a scrape of chapped lips, not the usual smoothness of silky plump lips, but it makes it all the more real. Callum screws his eyes tightly shut, and falls into the kiss before he realises what's actually happening, and pushes Ben off of him with a harshness. 

"No!" He mutters out, wiping his lips with the back of his hands, as if that's going to do something.

"Wha-" Ben breathes out, shoulders slumping once again. Confusion is written all across his face, looking depleted. "You just said you don't regret it!" 

Callum rubs his hand over his face. "That doesn't mean you can just kiss me like that again, it's just confusing me." 

"Why not?" Ben asks, holding his hands up. 

Something bubbles inside of Callum, threatening to escape with every second that passes. "Because I like you!" He explodes. "I like ya, and I know you'' never feel the same way." 

Callum stands up, a crack of his knees breaking up the tension of the silence between them. He turns his body away from Ben, not wanting to see his face when Ben inevitably breaks his heart. 

Ben lets out a soft chuckle, barely audible. "I love you." He admits,  _ finally _ . His voice is shaky, but he's never been more sure of what he's saying in his life. "I've been in love with you since we met." 

There's an aching silence in the room. The air runs cold, and neither of them are looking at the other. Ben's words echo, a constant repeat circling around Callum's mind.  _ He said he loves him. Loves. _

Callum turns his body slowly, redness spread right across his cheeks, tears welling up in his eyes. "What?" Callum asks, his voice quiet and shy and nerves run all the way through him, right down to the tip of his toes. He watches Ben with a soft adoration on his face, and his head is downcast, staring at the floor. He's shy, all of a sudden. Callum walks forward, closer and closer to Ben with every moment that passes. He crouches down, and hooks a finger underneath Ben's chin, pushing slightly, so that Ben takes the hint to look at Callum's face. When he eventually does, Callum produces the softest smile, and Ben's unable to do anything but replicate the smile - Callum's infectious when it comes to that. "What did you just say, Ben?"

"That I love you." Ben breathes out, watching Callum's reactions. 

Callum's finger remains under Ben's chin, his stubble prickling at his skin, but his thumb brushes over Ben's bottom lip. Tears well up in Callum's eyes, and he feels like crying, not for the first time today. Callum leans forward, and Ben watches his every move in anticipation, but nothing could prepare him for the reality of tingles that Callum causes him to have when their lips touch. Ben nearly jerks back at the feeling, and Callum grins against his lips, wanting,  _ needing _ more. Ben moves his hands to the back of Callum's head, pushing them even closer together, if that's even possible, and his legs start to wrap around Callum's body from where he's crouching down. He chuckles against Ben's lips, and moves to stand up, towering over him, though he doesn't pull away. His body towers over Ben's, leaving Ben craning his neck as Callum moves, until Callum's half stradling Ben. They stay there for a few moments, maybe even longer, not caring about keeping track of time. Callum eventually pulls away, allowing them to get their breath back, though Ben's willing to say he doesn't care about being able to breathe, as long as he's kissing Callum. Fingers are against Ben's cheek, skin touching skin, and Callum's looking down at him with a beaming grin, lips glossy and red and plump.

" _ I love you too _ ." 


	7. chapter seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Callum have officially sorted things out, but there's some explaining to do to their friends and family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's here !! the final chapter !! 
> 
> i really hope you enjoy this chapter, i think it's one of my favourites. i just want to thank everyone who has left kudos/comments and read this fic, because it really wouldn't exist in its entirety if people didn't enjoy it 
> 
> (i'm now going to sleep for a decade)
> 
> ps - this chapter does include smut 
> 
> tumblr: @callumsmitchells

Sunlight streams into the room, the first signs of a calm and warm day breaking through the openings of the curtains. It's bright, a line of light from the window, spreading across the floor and finally hitting the bed. Callum makes an attempt to stretch his legs out, aching to hear the soft crack of his knees and then momentarily his ankles, but something is stopping him from moving. Ben's body is wrapping around Callum's, curling into his body, their legs twisting around one another, his hand next to Callum's ear. His head is pressing against Callum's chest, a heavy weight bearing down onto him, but it's somehow relaxing to know that this is really happening, that they both want to be there. Callum looks down, and watches as Ben sleeps in the last part of his slumber before the sun in his eyes inevitably gets too bright and wakes him up. Callum lets his thumb skim over Ben's face, following the tracks created by little creases of smile lines, faint and now relaxed with his sleep. He creates a dot to dot with Ben's freckles, the ones that litter his skin just below his eyes, all the way across the bumps in his nose. Callum notices how his eyelashes fall down onto his cheeks and how he looks so much at peace now, a stark contrast from how he was looking only a day previously, like he had all the weight of the world on his shoulders. Callum smiles softly, and tilts his head down, so his nose is in amongst the knotted hair atop Ben's head, all fluffy and messy. It will probably tickle his nose, but Callum doesn't care. There's a distinctive smell, and it's something he craves because it's just so Ben. 

It's peaceful, for a few moments. There's no noise anywhere, no cars revving their engines, no children screaming - just peace and quiet. Callum could almost fall back to sleep - almost. He's got his fingers threading through Ben's hair, unknotting it as he goes, being careful not to tug too harshly. When he releases Ben's hair from his touch, it falls down onto his face, landing softly just above his brow bone. Callum's smile grows, watching as Ben looks so innocent with his hair like this. With his index finger, Callum brushes it away, tucking it behind Ben's ear as best he could. His other hand is against Ben's back, holding him in place against Callum's chest. His fingers are spread wide, hand running up and down in a comforting motion. Callum sighs softly. He could get used to this, waking up with Ben right by his side, no rush to do anything or be anywhere. There's a movement against his leg, Ben's knee sliding up as he starts to stir. Callum looks down at Ben's face, and there's a squint of his eyes in an attempt to block out the sun. 

"Morning." Callum says softly, his smile bright on his face. He's always been a morning person, somehow. His hand that was once on Ben's back is now snaking up, wide and warm and grounding, as he puts it against the back of Ben's head, allowing Ben to look up to him. 

"Mornin'." Ben grumbles out, but there's a smile spreading across his lips, warm and inviting, as he curls his arms further and further around Callum, like a boa constrictor with its prey. He presses his head back against Callum's chest, needing to be as close to him as possible, craving Callum's touch. "You're still here." 

Callum chuckles, and Ben moves up and down with Callum's chest, hearing and feeling the beat of his heart. "Course I am." Callum says. "I wouldn't want to be anywhere else."

Ben looks back up at Callum, his eyes wide like Bambi. His chin is digging into Callum's chest, but he doesn't complain. "Really?" Ben asks.

Callum hums, nodding his head gently. "Now come here and kiss me." He grins. 

Ben can't argue with that, and he untangles his legs with Callum's, moving to straddle him under the sheets. He holds Callum's face with one hand, and lets the other find Callum's hand, entwining their fingers together in a tight embrace. Ben grins, leaning down and taking Callum's lips between his own. It's soft, all the time in the world to take each other in, learn new things about each other, to touch. Callum pulls his knees up, and Ben slides ever closer to him, towering over Callum, making him crane his head up, exposing the skin of his neck. Ben grins as he strokes the skin there, feeling as the stubble becomes more and more sparse the further down Callum's neck he goes. He pulls away from the kiss, and watches as Callum reacts, completely blissed out. He chuckles softly, and runs his thumb over Callum's bottom lip, red and plump and glossy. He bends down, and nudges his nose to Callum's jawline, grinning wildly when he notices Callum jerk his head to the side, allowing Ben all the access he desires. There's a spot that Ben knows Callum loves, directly below his ear. It drives him crazy, so Ben presses his lips there in an open mouthed kiss, all hot and wet. Callum huffs out a gentle moan, feeling everything - all of Ben's body against his own, the warmth of Ben's lips against his skin, with the cooling, tingling sensation of his breath blowing onto his skin, leaving the tiniest of hairs standing to attention. Ben grins, hearing Callum's response, willing him on. It's stupid, how much he loves this; how much he's wanted this - and for so long too. 

Callum holds onto Ben with his free hand, pressing against his hips, thumb running circles over and over again - though Ben's certain they've transformed into hearts as times gone by. 

Ben pulls back when he needs to breathe properly, his chest heaving up and down, his heart thumping drastically. He watches Callum for a moment, neither of them speaking, not even making a sound, apart from their heavy breathes. There's a gloss to Callum's neck, and a growing redness that Ben just knows will stay there for a while now. His cheeks are a shade of pink, spreading right the way across his face and his eyes - God, his eyes - are a darker shade of blue, cast over in lust and want. Ben rocks forward slightly, and leans down to press a soft kiss to Callum's lips. He's only there for a few short moments, a sweet kiss shared between two halves of a whole, and when he pulls back, he connects his thumb lightly to the corner of Callum's lips. "I love you." Ben whispers out, and it's like the first time he's said it, except it's not. There's something so warm and loving about it, perhaps the fact that there's a beautiful glow coming from the side of him, illuminating his face in beams of gold. 

"I love you too." Callum responds, his hands making their way onto the lower part of Ben's back, fingers all splayed out, holding him. It's so grounding, having his hand there, warming Ben's body up. "Which is why I was wondering - will you be my boyfriend? Officially?" 

_Oh_. 

Ben bites his lip in a vain attempt to hide his growing smile at Callum's words. He looks so shy, asking that, and it makes Ben's heart explode tenfold. He nods, slowly, his throat twisted as he tries to get the words out. "Yeah." He finally breathes. "I'll be your boyfriend, course I will." 

The beaming smile on Callum's face just makes it all worth it. All the pain of the past week following the argument is forgotten, as though it never existed in the first place, because this is all they've both wanted for so long now. 

* * *

There's music playing over the radio, an old Frank Sinatra classic providing the soundtrack to a beautiful morning. The sun's still beaming through the window, unrelenting, though this time in the kitchen. There's a sizzle from the pan that Callum's watching over, and he turns the flames down to a low setting. Ben's sitting at the table, glasses on his face now. He's got his phone in his hand, and he's scrolling through social media, chuckling at a few things here and there, reading out the gossip to Callum, who's just happy to have this - to have something so domestic and heartfelt. Callum hums along to the song, flipping the eggs and then the bacon over to the other side. There's a light tap as though something is being placed down, and Callum doesn't have time to look around, because Ben's soon wrapping his arms around Callum's body, snaking his hands up so they're against his chest, holding him. He stands on his tiptoes, only just, and breathes out against Callum's neck, watching as goosebumps start to rise on his skin. Callum ducks his neck instinctively, and Ben chuckles softly, though it sounds a lot more menacing to Callum, with him being so close to Callum's ears. He stands on the tip of his toes even further now, and presses his lips to Callum's neck, leaving open mouthed kisses anywhere he could reach. 

Callum giggles - actually giggles - and nudges his elbow out gently to dig into Ben's ribs. "Get off." He whines. "Unless you want me to burn your breakfast." 

"Leave it." Ben says, grinning against Callum's neck. "I want you." 

Callum turns under Ben's hold, and takes him into an embrace of his own, leaving a kiss against Ben's forehead. "I'm not having you complain that you're hungry. Eat this, then you can have me." 

Ben whines, but cuddles into Callum nonetheless, putting his hands against his skin, hooking underneath his shirt. 

"Anyway." Callum says, brushing Ben's hair back. "I've been looking for this." He says, tugging at the material on Ben's back. "That's my shirt." 

Ben looks up at Callum innocently, practically fluttering his eyelashes. "Maybe." He says cheekily. "Now it's mine."

Callum rolls his eyes, but he can't help but smile at Ben's words. "Toast or bun?" He asks, turning back around to the frying pan. 

There's a momentary pause, like Ben's trying to think. "Bun." He decides finally, and swings his hand out to slap against Callum's arse. 

Callum turns around instantly, holding out a spatula as a weapon. He's silent, trying to look threatening, but breaks his facade when Ben starts to rumble out a laugh. 

There's a soft knock at the kitchen door, and it opens just moments later. Kathy pushes her head around the door, and smiles softly at the sight before her: Ben and Callum laughing until they're red in the face, pure bliss and happiness exuding from the pair of them.

"What's going on in here then?" She asks, folding her arms in front of her, but she can't help the smile that’s on her face. 

"We didn't wake you, did we?" Ben asks, leaning against the kitchen counter now. 

Kathy shakes her head. "No love, I was up and out before you even woke up." She explains. "I presume we had a guest last night?"

Callum looks at Ben out of the side of his eyes, a grin growing on his face. Ben chuckles, and moves out of the way so Callum can put their breakfast on some plates. 

"We did." Ben laughs, putting his hand on Callum's waist and rubbing his hand up and down. "We're together. Properly, this time." 

Kathy raises an eyebrow, questioning her son silently as she flicks on the kettle.

"It's a long story." Ben explains, scratching his beard awkwardly. "All you need to know is, we weren't together properly last time, it was just a bit of a joke, but now we're definitely together, and I love him." 

"What, and you were okay with this Callum?" Kathy asks, confusion still evident on her face. 

Callum nods, because he was, really. It just went wrong. "We both agreed to it, but feelings got in the way and that's why we argued. I didn't think he felt the same way that I did, but he does. We're good now, everything's sorted." 

Kathy nods, slowly. "Well." She starts. "As long as you're both happy, I can't complain. No more moping, from either of you." 

Ben looks at Callum with a gentle smile on his face, and Kathy leaves the room with her cup of tea and a small handful of biscuits, leaving them in peace. “One down, two to go.” Ben lets out into the world. 

Callum shakes his softly. “And probably the worst two to tell.” He says. “Remind me again why I let you talk me into this?”

“Er.” Ben says, aghast. “You didn’t exactly tell me you didn’t want to do it. Plus, I know for a fact you don’t regret a single thing.”

Callum smiles, and lets out a soft chuckle. “Course I don’t. Except maybe having to tell Jay and Lola it was all fake, just because we thought it’d be hilarious, apart from the fact it wasn’t actually that fake at all.” He says. “And now we have to convince them that what we have now, is real and that we’re actually together.”

Ben nods his head slowly, letting Callum’s words sink in. “On second thoughts.” He says. “We don’t have to tell them anything at all. We could just pretend we’ve been together all along.”

"We’re not lying to our friends, Ben.” Callum says, adamantly. “For a second time!”

Ben chuckles softly, and presses a hand to Callum’s thigh. “Can we at least wait until tonight to tell them? I’ve got more important things to focus on.” He says, voice low.

“Like what?” Callum asks. 

Ben grins, and leans forward to swoop in for a kiss. “Like.” He says, pondering for a moment as he leans into a secondary kiss. “Like you and me, upstairs, no clothes.” 

Callum smirks instantly, and his cheeks flush fuchsia pink alongside the grinning. “I suppose I can be okay with that.” He says, nudging his nose against Ben’s skin, nipping at his lips.

* * *

Ben lets out a guttural moan as he sinks down, feeling complete and entirely full. Callum’s below him, flat on his back and spread out, looking up at Ben as though he’s this ethereal being, and he can’t believe this is actually happening. Callum’s hands are everywhere, needing to find a piece of Ben to hold, to cradle. He’s shaking, the feeling of being inside Ben all too much and somehow not enough all at the same time. Ben jerks forward, hitting just the right spot, and suddenly he’s chest to chest with his boyfriend, their bodies moving together with each intake and the later exhaling of breath. Ben’s warm against Callum, his lips hot where they press to Callum’s skin. 

“You feel so good.” Callum whispers, clawing at Ben’s back. There’s definitely scratches appearing there, leaving marks of red clashing against his pale skin, but Ben doesn’t seem to care in the slightest. 

Ben grins against Callum’s skin, and moves himself higher up on Callum’s dick, feeling empty with just the tip left inside him now, stretching him out with a tingling burn that leaves him aching for more. “Only good?” He teases but there’s a hitch in his breath as he moves his hips in circular motions, watching as Callum writhes beneath him. 

“Fuck.” Callum exhales, grabbing hold of Ben’s waist and holding him in position even tighter, jerking his own hips up and down, the slap of skin on skin deafening in the quiet room. “Amazing, perfect, all I want.” He recites like a poem just slipping off the tip of his tongue. 

Ben chuckles and leans down, moving his hips in time with Callum, bodies meeting in the middle. He nips at Callum’s bottom lip and pulls, hands either side of his face. “That’s more like it babe.” Ben says, and rolls his hips as he watches Callum’s head sink further and further into the pillows, as though it’s taking over him. He buries his head right next to Callum’s, lips against his ears, and there’s soft huffs escaping him, his breath hitching and mingling with tiny whines. “I’m close.” He whispers, throat completely dry.

Callum snakes a hand all the way up Ben’s back, ending its journey when he cradles the back of his head, fingers threading through his hair. His other hand remains on Ben’s hips wrapping around his lower back, and he holds Ben against his body, working them both through this together. He moves his hips masterfully, knowing exactly where to find Ben’s spot, and how to tear Ben apart with every second that passes by. It’s not long before Ben’s breathing becomes erratic, red hot in Callum’s ear, and they both know what happens next. Ben tenses, and feels the heat in the pit of his stomach as he comes, stickiness on Callum’s stomach as well as his own. He can tell that Callum’s close too, by the way his eyes scrunch up and his face contorts in the moments just before pleasure. Ben chuckles lightly, and pecks Callum’s lips in a touch so featherlight, before he circles his hips once more, forgoing the pain growing inside him as he over stimulates himself, his only focus now is Callum, and how beautiful he looks. 

“Come for me.” Ben whispers, and pushes Callum’s hair back out of the way of his eyes, and then pushes down once more, practically sitting on Callum’s thighs. He feels a shake, and Callum’s mouth opens instinctively, a squeak of a moan tumbling out. Ben can feel Callum fill the condom inside of him, all warm and passionate and it’s _everything_. He falls back onto Callum’s body, and they just stay there, holding one another, not a care in the world about the outside, about anyone behind these four walls that encapsulate them. 

There’s a calmness shared between them, both of them breathing out into the atmosphere. Callum’s got his arms around Ben’s body, holding him, fingers trailing up and down his skin, soothing him. Ben’s head is in the crook of Callum’s neck, breathing in his scent, a peacefulness between them. The only sound is from outside, seeping in through the window, even though it’s closed. They can just about hear the market, the mid-day trade now firmly in full swing, a steady stream of people on their lunch break from work, buying the odd thing here and there, maybe even just visiting their market stall holder friends. 

“I can cook.” Callum puts out into the world, breaking up the silence that’s built from inside the comfort of the room. He cranes his neck to look down at Ben, who’s already looking up at Callum with confusion spreading across his face. “Tonight. To tell Jay and Lola about us. If that’s what you want.” He shrugs his shoulders, and Ben’s body moves with his own. 

Ben smiles, and kisses Callum’s bare shoulder. “What did I do to deserve you?” He asks, smiling up at Callum. “Course I want that.”

Callum turns his body slightly, just to get closer to Ben, and hooks his finger to the side of Ben’s face, pressing his lips softly to Ben’s, holding them both there. Ben rolls into the touch, entwining his legs with Callum’s, their bodies twisting as one complete entity, belonging together entirely. When they pull apart, Ben looks back up at Callum, and smiles shyly. “Do we need to go and get food in then?” He asks, and there’s something so domestic about it that makes Callum’s heart melt. 

He nods, and presses another kiss to Ben’s lips. “Are they free tonight?” Callum asks.

Ben shrugs. “I’ll text them and ask.” He says. “Doubt they’ll say no, especially if I say you’re cooking.” 

Callum chuckles, and shakes his head softly. “They don’t even know we’ve spoken to each other.” Callum says, and then he realises. “What if they don’t believe us?” 

“They will.” Ben says. “Maybe not at first, but they will. They believed us last time.”

“They shouldn’t have.” Callum chuckles. 

Ben grins cheekily. “But now they should.” 

* * *

There’s a tapping knock at the door, just five minutes before Jay and Lola were due to arrive. 

Ben’s standing next to Callum, watching him as he cooks. He pushes himself away from the kitchen counter, and starts to walk over to the door. “They’ve come to nosy.” He says, watching back at Callum, who laughs and shakes his head. Ben opens the door, and lets Jay and Lola walk in. 

“So you’ve sorted things out?” Lola asks, a smile bright on her face. She wraps her arms around Ben and holds him like she’s not seen him for a while even though it’s only really been a few hours at best. 

Jay pats Ben on the back, and pulls him in for a hug when Lola finally releases him from her embrace.

“That’s what we want to talk about.” Ben says finally, and Callum turns around with a bright smile on his face, and a blush that’s spreading viciously across his cheeks. 

He puts the plates down on the table, and leaves out glasses for them to fill with whatever they like. 

“At least you ain’t moping about anymore.” Jay says. “Either of you. Honestly, I reckon Kathy was about an hour away from banging your heads together, old school style.” 

Callum chuckles softly, and sits down next to Ben, needing to feel his presence beside him, almost like Ben’s his comfort blanket that he needs at all times. It’s odd, because he’s so comfortable around both Jay and Lola, but there’s something in him that craves Ben to calm him down. “We basically just wanted to say sorry.” Callum admits, breaking his silence. “We’ve been idiots, the past few days, and everyone was just trying to help us, but we didn’t listen.” He turns to look at Ben, who’s smiling shyly.

Ben breathes out a sigh, and it shocks Callum that he’s actually nervous for this, because he hasn’t seemed nervous to admit this at all, all day. “The thing is.” He starts, and then pauses, as though he’s trying to put everything into words. “The thing is, we weren’t actually together.” 

_That’s it then. It’s out there._

Lola and Jay raise their eyebrows and then furrow them in tandem, confusion written all over their faces. “What?” They both manage to finally get out, after sharing a look between them. 

“It started out as a joke, just to wind the two of you up because we knew you thought we were together. Then, things happened, I guess, and once mum found out, Callum wasn’t happy about it. That’s why we argued, because I was an idiot and thought I was funny. I just didn’t realise that Callum was struggling with how he really felt.” Ben tries to explain everything as best he can, but it’s confusing even for him, and he’s been living it.

Jay narrows his eyes, and flickers between Ben and Callum. “But the two of you?” He says, trying to comprehend everything he’s hearing. “Lola was right, you did look close.” 

Callum smiles, and looks down at his lap in an attempt to avoid eye contact. Ben stretches out his hand, and Callum takes hold of it, perching their connected hands on top of the table. “That’s what the argument was about. I loved Ben, and I knew it before we even started all this. I just kept it inside, but we sorted everything out, and Ben feels the same way.”

Ben squeezes Callum’s hand, running his thumb over his knuckles. “Now we’re boyfriends. Officially. Properly, this time.”

“Seriously?” Lola asks, but there’s a knowing smile creeping onto her face, beaming like a lighthouse.

“Yeah.” Callum grins, and there’s a giddiness in his voice that they can all hear.

After all that, it’s finally worked out. They’re finally happy, and in love, and the world is just _perfect_.

* * *

It’s dark, when Jay and Lola finally leave. Lamps illuminate the room in a yellow glow, warm and homely. Ben’s tired to the bone, even though he’s done nothing strenuous all day. He falls into Callum’s hold, hearing his heart thumping in his chest. Callum runs his fingers through Ben’s hair, and it brings him even more comfort. Ben wraps his arms around Callum’s body, squeezing tightly. 

“I love you, you know?” Callum asks, holding onto Ben tightly.

Ben looks up at Callum, chin against his chest. “Yeah?” He asks, teasingly. “Just as well I love you too then.”

Callum smiles softly, and leans down to kiss Ben. There’s no heat to it, but it still causes bubbles in Ben’s stomach, and a lightness in his head at how soft it is 

“Bed?” Callum asks. “I’ll tidy all this up in the morning.”

“Lead the way.”


End file.
